#of things and is good a lot of things but that wouldn’t fit with the perfect poster boy image that they have crafted for him recently
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cant stop thinking about stepmom!taeyeon who manipulates and eventually convinces her werewolf stepkid to use her body on the day the full moon comes out 🥺…
the moment it actually happens, she gets more than expected and it’s so painfully pleasurable but hey at least the dick hit the spots iykwim
MONSTERFUCKING, STEPCEST
i’m going to be so honest with you anon, i love this. i love this a lot and you know it because the day you sent this i posted that i wanted to kiss you and i still do but for some reason i can seem to write anything around this and it’s the reason this post is going to be so straightforward, only fuck*ng not background as much as i love, i really tried but couldn’t come up with anything i liked :( that being said..
she would so take a double look at your cock because jesus, why is it so big? it was already hard for her to take you the first time you fucked ever, human form and all, but this? sure she would feel for days, no matter how much time you spent between her thighs, always the dotting daughter, the caring girl, lapping at her sweet cunt to get her ready, using your now longer tongue to open your way inside her. thighs and waist burning with the little cuts from your claws, she doesn’t dare to look down and see the mess it must look, can’t do much but whimper and try to hold your arms as you move her around the you feel like, whispering in the sweet voice of hers “sweet girl, calm down, please” when you growl at her neck, frustrated that you can’t seem to fit inside her, your tip pushing against her entrance a little insistently. would slide her hands between your bodies, moaning just from feeling you under her touch, using her own fingers for a while, she’s so unbelievable wet, can take three so easily, but it’s not like her hand is that big.
there would be so much going on once you finally slide inside her— she thinks she’s being split in two, your teeth grazing her neck and a deadly grip on her waist and it’s too much but it’s nothing because it’s barely half of you and she needs more, kicks and screams but pushes back, wants you deep. keeps one hand over her belly the whole time to feel you hitting there, clearly growing more and more wet each time. when you start to simply push, knot forcing its way inside her already abused pussy, has lost count of how many time she has come by then but does again so hard, it’s like the first time, feeling herself get even more full with cum. and speaking of cum, there’s just so much of it… once you manage to slide out, she feels so dirty at how it just keeps flowing out of her, but at same time it’s so good. all the pain, worth it.
lays there with you later and wouldn’t complain if you decide to lap at her some more, in fact finding it endearing, maybe it’s a werewolf thing, a way to try and soothe her sore cunt. she loves you so much, you’re not hers but still, such a good daughter, always caring for her, even like this :( does she have any idea of how to explain to your dad what are all the cuts on her body? hell no, but she can think of something.
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Astray far Away Ch4
Adar x reader | SMUT🔞 | Ch.3
Sexy bath times and rowdy kids! An eventful day for our Lord Father and his companion.
AKA the chapter took on a will of its own and accepted a sidequest or two instead of moving on.
Morning came way too quick.
And so did the frantic knocking on your door that had you groaning in frustration.
“Just come in, I’m decent.”
It was Grasho, shouldering her way through the door with two bowls of food and a stack of clothes hung over her shoulder.
“Morning! Got food and simple dresses.” She was quick to place the food on a table and toss the clothes onto the bed where you sat.
“Food or cloth first?” The question was asked but waiting for an answer was not in the cards as Grasho already reached for the new garments she brought.
“Please, food first. I need a second to wake up before I get up and be active.” You mimicked her energy, making grabby hands at the bowls from where you sat on the mattress. “I am seriously starving, thanks.” With the bowl in your hands you happily ate in silence, chowing down the broth even faster than Grasho finished hers.
“Woah. You eat good for a mortal!” With a satisfied noise she put her empty bowl away and was up on her feet. “Now we fit! Got lots to do today.” Grasho rubbed her hands together so she wouldn’t be immediately grabbing at your clothes again. Boundaries. She learned.
You worked through the pile dhe brought easily, no longer feeling that nagging panic with having to undress in front of her. She paid your bare chest no attention and kindly turned away when you changed your trousers for proper undergarments.
All the items Grasho brought you fit perfectly and soon enough she almost shoved you out the door with the order to go find Adar. “You go see Lord Father. Still need a bath. And wound checks.”
You barely got a chance to grab Adar’s tunic before you were out the door and on your way to his tent, wishing Grasho a good day as she went back to her workshop.
Finding Adar’s tent was easy enough and luckily you found him as well.
“Adar? Do you have time?” You approached him with care and kept a safe distance so as to not intrude.
“I hear you almost fought last night. Krod defended you after you spoke kindly of the uruk.” He leaned back in his chair and watched you.
“I’m sorry if I caused any disturbance, I tried my hardest to ignore them but..” The event was still clear in your mind and gnawing at you. With a quiet sniffle you looked at the ground. “The names they called me. The things they implied I did, I snapped. I’m sorry..” You were clutching the black tunic to your chest as you tried your hardest not to cry like a weakling in front of your leader.
“From what I heard they called you a harlot, yes? Implying you spent time with Glûg’s family for pleasure.” He looked you over once, twice. You wore new garments like he suggested. The tunic he gave you wrapped tightly in your arms.
“You are always allowed to cause a scene. My children see you as an equal. A part of the family.” Adar had gotten up and grabbed his sword and dagger, along with a bag he stuffed with supplies. “You came by to ask about that bath, yes?”
You let Adar lead the way through and out of the town, further towards the mountain and into a tree-littered area. It was all just as gray and ashen as your village, burned trees and all. And, steam? Fog?
Then, it all came into view behind the trees. Adar had taken you to a hot spring.
“Mortals prefer privacy when bathing. I did not get that wrong, did I?” Near the rocks beside the spring Adar placed down his bag and unpacked the supplies he brought. He gave you time and space to do what you needed, not looking as you undressed and only turning back once you cleared him to do so.
“You can look, it’s okay.” Your gentle voice had him turn to face the water and sit down at the edge of it, taking off his boots and rolling up the legs of his trousers.
As his legs lowered into the water Adar let out a groan, the heat of the water relieving some of his aches.
“You’re welcome to join me fully, if you’d like. I don't mind.” You moved closer to him, raising yourself partially out of the water and fidgeted with the bandages to get them off now that they had soaked for a moment.
“Let me assist you with that.” Adar beckoned you over when you couldn’t find the start of the wrapping. With careful hands he unwrapped it, layer by layer and rinsed the remains of the dried medicine.
The cuts had all closed up, only a few scabs remaining over risen pink lines that spelled out his name. His touch lingered and your hand found his, taking it off your skin and placing it back on your chest.
“I invited you in for more than just to let the water soothe your aches.” When he withdrew his hand you let yourself sink further into the water again.
Adar was clearly affected by your actions. It showed in his restless movements and how he cleared his throat as he adjusted each and every part of his armor.
With a quick dive you wet your hair and moved over to Adar’s legs, coming back up only an inch away from him with your hands on his knees, pushing them apart.
“You’ve been taking care of me since I got here. At least let me return the favor.” You eyed the strain in his trousers for a moment before looking up and you could see him contemplating, and then nod.
Excited, you went to work and fumbled to open Adar’s trousers to pull him free, wrapping one hand around his length to pump him a few times before moving forward, wetting the fabric around his legs with your body.
As your tongue laps at the head of his cock Adar sighed and leaned back on his hands, watching as you worked him. Adar’s soft moans and gentle slosh of the water was all you heard with every inch you took him deeper into your mouth.
His taste was salty on your tongue, leaking with each pull of your lips. It was with great difficulty that you managed to take all of him into your mouth, the tip at the back of your throat causing you to gag.
Adar was holding back his sounds, trying to keep himself from bucking his hips into you, fingers digging into the layer of ash on the stones beneath him.
He watched as drool and tears ran down your face as you eagerly sucked him off, a hand coming to rest on your cheek.
“You know there is no need for you to do th– ahh, oh, don’t stop..” Adar’s voice cracked as your hand cupped his balls and your tongue swirled around the head of his cock, your other hand working what didn’t fit comfortably in your mouth.
Adar’s earlier soft sighs turned into full moans, unable to keep his hips still when he spilled his seed down your throat.
Only when he let go of your cheek you separated from him with a cough, having swallowed all that he gave you.
“Go wash up, I’d like to have you returned home before dark.” Adar worked to tuck himself back into his trousers and retrieved a towel for you while you washed yourself, shivering immediately from the cold air as you got out of the water.
As you stood by him, drying your hair, bare for the world to see, Adar glanced over your body. His gaze lingered and his mind replayed the words you had spoken to him.
Please.." You pulled him in closer with your heels pressed into his back, moaning as his cock hit just right inside you. "Make me a mother."
Adar’s eyes were on your stomach and he wondered. Had his seed taken root yet, or was he to try again? Would you even still want to, now that your mind wasn’t partially hazed by alcohol?
The walk home was a quiet one. Partially to Adar’s wandering mind, as well as you keeping yourself busy with sightseeing. The dull light scattered by the damaged trees gave an eerie air to the surrounding woods, but you could not keep your eyes off it. It reminded you of graphite drawings back home.
Home.
You had been so focused on the uruk and settling within their community you hadn’t even given a thought to finding if your old home was still intact. It probably wasn’t, if you took into consideration that most of the structure was wood, not even close to being as sturdy as the tavern that still partially stood despite the flaming rocks.
“Say, Adar.” You fell into step with him once more and saw you had his attention.
“Can we eh.. Can you help me find a place in town? I want to see what’s left of it.”
With an affirming nod Adar hummed in agreement.
“Where exactly was the building you seek? There is a chance it was torn down for resources.” Adar thought out loud in hope to lessen your hurt if you found the place to be gone.
You looked around and were sad to say you had no idea where in the old village you stood now with the addition of so many smaller tent homes around and other structures down and broken.
The tavern that served as your current residence was used as a starting point, looking into the direction your old home stood and started wandering.
Through the homes and workshops young uruk played. Two boys with toy swords ran and yelled in passing. Visions of the once green grass and sandy paths appeared before you as you followed your feet towards where you’d find your old home.
Your home, that was now nothing more than a lot filled with salvaged wood and stone, sorted and piled.
It hurt to see your home no longer stood, even if it was never much in the first place.
Your grief was short lived, as high pitched yelling pulled you from your thoughts and a weight suddenly slammed into your leg. A young child had clamped herself around your lower leg, trembling. Behind you more yelling sounded and you picked up the scared child and let her wrap herself around you, sharp nails digging into your skin.
“Oh crap, it's Adar. Run!” The two boys you saw earlier dropped their toys and ran off in the opposite direction, away from you and Adar who stayed at your side.
“Are you alright, little one? The boys are gone.” You stroked her coarse hair that sat in a lopsided ponytail tied with a clearly recently found, shiny ribbon.
Big, sad eyes looked up at you, tiny hands still grabbing your top as she nodded.
“Yes, lady.” She looked away from you when Adar stepped closer again after retrieving the toy swords the boys had dropped, and quickly shied away once more. Her face was hidden in the crook of your neck. “This is Myko,” Adar’s gentle voice spoke beside you, his hand coming up to rest on her back. “She loves spending time with the wargs. Wants to be a warg rider when she’s big enough.”
At the mention of her interest she peeked up once more, a glimmer in her eyes that had you play into it.
“Oh, you should show me one day! I would love to learn about the wargs.” You gently put the young girl back on her feet, letting her run off after she excitedly agreed to show you the wargs.
Turning back to Adar you noticed the toy swords in his hands. “It sounded like those two have given other kids trouble before with how fast they ran from you.” There was amusement in your tone, and in Adar’s as well.
“They are twin boys who have taken it upon themselves to cause havoc wherever they go, yes.” Adar sighed, an air of sadness clear in his eyes. “Their mother has a hard time keeping them in control.”
“Twins, huh.” You mimicked. “They didn’t look alike, from what I saw.” You stepped back into the town streets aside Adar, thinking back at the two boys. “I have to be honest here, though. I don’t think I’ve ever seen twins before in my lifetime.”
Now it was Adar who chuckled, a sound that caught you so off guard you nearly missed the hole in the ground and tripped. “You will have to get used to seeing doubles, then. Twins are common among uruk.” He made a sudden turn towards a home and handed the two wooden swords back to a woman walking with a crutch. She missed her left lower leg but moved around with practiced skill. She and Adar exchanged quick words before he moved on once more.
“You’ll find most twins to be different at first with their differences in skin, but on closer look you will find there to be many similarities. Eyes, ear shape and other features match their counterparts. Next time Lech and Kach decide to grace you with their presence, take the time to have a good look.” the conversation kept up until your paths split on your way to each of your homes. Adar had business to attend as the Lord Father of his people, and you desperately needed rest.
#sometimes i write#adar#stepdadar#adar trop#trop adar#rings of power adar#rings of power#trop#lotr#the rings of power#adar x reader#adar smut#adar imagine#adar fanfic
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Any recommendations on hurt-comfort Buddie that will make you cry? HEA please!
I started to answer this but accidentally clicked on a Tumblr link so I gotta start over 😂
I haven't read Buddie fics in a while so these are a bit older. (I'm going to catch up soon! I've just been in a phase where I'm either reading Teen Wolf fics or physical books)
Also haven't updated my bookmarks yet. Sadly a lot of great authors I'd normally recommend have turned anti-Buddie since April and I'd rather not promote them in Buddie posts if they're not safe to follow anymore as a Buddie fan.
Please check the tags of a fic before reading in case something is triggering for you!
the things that haunt me in the middle of the night by justhockey
2,4k, rated G
He gasps for breath and it feels like a reflex - like coming up for air after being sucked under. Like a desperate, manic thing.
He’s safe, he knows that. Knows he was never really in much danger anyway. But the sound of it all - the waves, the rain, the crashing and the thundering - it echoes in his head, ricochets through his bones. It lives inside of him, he guesses, even after all these years. That fear, the exhaustion, the crippling terror of finding the surface only to realise that Christopher was gone.
He rubs at his sternum, tries to breathe deeply, tries to blink away the memories of the day the water nearly took everything from him.
I let my guard down by bucksclipboard
6,5k, rated M
"It didn’t stop. Buck went from hoping the packages were from someone special to suspecting someone was toying with him. The hopeless romantic in him was slowly wilting. When he opened the latest letter, suddenly he was not so sure his secret admirer was of the good-natured kind. "
or: who needs police protection when you have eddie diaz by your side?
Cut me slack (I've watched your heart stop) by kat_atthewisco
Rated G, 5,4k
“Well, unfortunately I am calling you specifically for your role as Mr. Buckley’s power of attorney. He does need a couple of decisions made about his care that he’s not fit for at the moment. If you’re able to get here soon that would be best, I can’t tell you much over the phone.” To her credit, Deirdre does sound apologetic, and Eddie’s panic has begun to ratchet back up.
“I’ll be there as fast as I can, is he- please, how bad?” Eddie repeats.
In which Eddie gets The Call from Cedars-Sinai while he's off work thanks to a healing injury. Being Buck's emergency contact is suddenly a very real thing.
Never More To Leave Here by devirnis
Rated T, 10,2k
"Can you remind my brother that we were supposed to get lunch?” Maddie asks.
“Uh sure,” Eddie says slowly, confused. “But why don’t you just call him yourself?”
“I did, a couple times, but he didn’t answer. I assumed he was still with you?”
Eddie thinks back to last night, to Buck specifically making plans to go back to his own place so he wouldn’t be late for lunch with Maddie. Buck had texted him when he got home, just a simple night :) that still made Eddie’s heart flutter, so obviously Buck had made it back to the loft… But there haven’t been any texts from Buck all morning. Not that that is necessarily unheard of, but especially over the last few weeks it’s become rarer and rarer for even a few hours to go by without Eddie’s phone dinging with a message notification from Buck.
A small tendril of worry curls around Eddie’s ribs.
BTHB: locked up & left behind
Diagnosis: Dumbass by snarkymuch
Rated T, 2,7K
Christopher scrunched his face, then stopped rummaging through his pack to grab something from the ground—something that turned out to be his phone.
“No, nope—who do you think you’re calling?” he asked, trying to reach for it, but Christopher had already hit the button, dialing someone—whom he’d bet anything was his father.
Christopher pulled away, out of reach, phone to his ear, then a moment later saying, “Yeah, I’m okay, dad—yeah, I know—no, but he fell out of a tree—”
“He is fine, though!” Buck yelled, hoping to stop the inevitable freakout from Eddie. “Eddie, do you hear me? I’m fine!”
--or--
Buck takes Chris out for a light hike, somehow ends up falling out of a tree, and Chris patches him up while waiting for his dad to arrive.
Presumed Dead by inkonmyheartandonthepage
Rated G, 4,4K
The fresh air was supposed to have been good for Buck. A small hike that he had done a million times. A nice hike that gave him a workout and at the same time allowed him to sift through his thoughts and feelings and to focus on what he really wanted.
Instead, he’s stuck in the middle of nowhere at a rest stop watching some asshole drive away in his jeep.
OR
The 118 crew arrive a fender bender only to find it's Buck's jeep on fire and the body inside dead and burning.
The monsters turned out to be just trees by Ink_Dancer
Rated T, 8,4k
Buck and Eddie are searching for a missing person, and they're already lost in the woods when Buck gets injured and makes their situation a lot more complicated. With the sun going down, they're forced to spend the night outside, with only each other for warmth and shelter.
(set post-buck's recovery from the firetruck, but no other specific time markers. nebulously within the show's canon.)
It's what my rotting bones will sing when the rest of me is dead by heartbeatdiaz
Rated T, 12,4k
"Eddie? Eds, can you hear me?” Buck rubs his knuckles against Eddie's sternum, a little too harsh, a little too desperate. "Eddie!"
Eddie croaks out a weak, barely there, whine as Buck's knuckles do the trick and his eyes open in slits.
"Evan?" He chokes out, his voice so hoarse and raspy that it must have been hurting his throat. "You're real?" He whispers in awe, his hand twitching as his side like he wants to reach up to Buck— touch his face— but he's too weak to do that. Eddie's brow furrowed but a small smile graces his lips, barely there. "I didn't give up. I made it home to you."
or;
the one where a call goes wrong and leaves everyone thinking eddie was dead, buck finds about the will through a letter and comes to some other revelations in the process.
and in which eddie finds his way back home and finally gets to be happy with the love of his life.
BTHB Prompt: Missing and Presumed Dead
Let me go by tawaifeddiediaz
Rated T, 8,1K
For the first time since he met him, he wasn’t sure where Buck was, and it was driving him insane. His shift ended three hours later than Eddie on Tuesdays, and today, he had texted saying that he was going to pick up groceries.
After that, he hadn’t returned back home.
Kindness: What Connects Us by FandomLife54
Rated T, 9,6k
Still off balance, Buck slams his left heel onto the roof, heaving forward to catch the collar of that yellow shirt. And there’s no conscious decision making here. It’s all instinct, and he’s grateful for it. If he’d given his overzealous mind the chance to consider another way, he would have missed his shot. Instead, his arms hurl the boy into the hands of another survivor...
And his right foot misses the edge.
OR
Buck catches Chris before he rolls off the firetruck, and it's him who falls back into the retreating waters of the tsunami. Unconscious and seriously injured, he's unaware that his team has been searching for him, never giving up as the days pass.
A leaf falls on loneliness by iimpossible_things
Not rated, 11,1k
Buck doesn’t think that if he were to say, “I’m in a bad place”, that anyone would turn him away. Really, he doesn’t. The 118 has too many good, kind people for that.
But every time he wants to open his mouth, to say something, to reach out to Eddie or Bobby or Hen or Chim, he hears Eddie yelling, “you’re exhausting.”
—you’re exhausting, you’re exhausting, you’re exhausting—
So each day he does his job and he laughs and he jokes and he pretends he’s the care-free goofball he’s always been. And each day he packs away his bruises and his worries, takes them home to his empty loft with its quiet rooms, and licks his wounds in silence.
And I watched a part of myself die 'cause no amount of freedom gets you clean by himbobuckley
WARNING: rape/non-con. Rated T, 10,2K
Buck goes out drinking after a particularly tragic call and the night takes a turn for the worse when he's targeted and assaulted. Struggling in the aftermath and unsure how to handle it, Buck tries to distance himself from his friends and family, believing that with time he can simply move past it on his own. Eddie notices something is wrong with Buck and desperately tries to get through to his friend, fearing the worst.
or:
Buck goes through the fucking ringer. eddie notices something's horribly wrong. you can contact my lawyer for emotional damages.
or:
“I heard about what happened yesterday,” Eddie says softly. “I’m sorry I wasn’t there. And that I didn’t know. I should’ve gone out with you, or made you come over, or-”
“Eddie,” Buck interrupts. “It’s- it’s okay. I just went out drinking. It’s fine.”
“Drinking alone?”
“Yeah,” he stammers. “Yeah, alone.”
“Hey listen, why don’t you come over tonight? We can do a movie night. And… I have something to tell you.”
“I’m sorry, Eddie,” Buck murmurs, feeling the tears welling up again. “I don’t think I can tonight.”
“Hey, wait Buck-”
“I’ll see you tomorrow.”
Blue skies by spaceprincessem
36,7k, rated T
“Most babies are born as accidents,” She says suddenly, like she’s decided that Buck has passed, that she can trust him with this.
Buck doesn’t really have an answer because that question hits way to fucking close to home. A year or so ago he would have said, yes, I was an accident, so I know how that goes, but Buck knows better now. Knows that he would almost give anything for that answer to still be yes. Evie’s finger works under the seal to rip it open, a stack of important looking papers dumping out onto the table in front of her.
“Not me,” she says without looking up as she organizes them into a neat stack, “I was engineered.”
And.
And Buck’s pretty fucking sure a giant, cataclysmic hole has ripped right open, dragging him down to the earth’s core where he vaporizes into dust.
{or Buck meets another savior baby and everything comes crashing down}
Leave The Light On (I'll Be Coming Home) by HMSLusitania
Rated M, 44,4k, fandom classic
“We’re here for our grandson,” Helena says.
“Chris is still sleeping,” Buck says.
“I meant, we’re here to take him back to Texas,” Helena clarifies.
“Yeah,” Buck says. He’s too tired, way too tired to be tactful. “Over my dead body.”
--
An accident on a call leaves Buck with custody of Chris after Eddie is... missing presumed.
While they navigate their new family circumstances -- and fight to stay together, despite Eddie's parents' best efforts -- a John Doe wakes up in a coma ward with no memory of his own life beyond the knowledge he has a son named Christopher and, somehow, he needs to get home.
Over The Age, Over Again by mintedwitcher
Rated E, 16,5k
EXCERPT:
He would’ve fallen down the cliffside if it hadn’t been for Bobby on the winch. Because that… that’s Buck’s jeep. There’s no denying it, no mistaking it. That is Buck’s jeep. Hanging almost sideways off a ledge, the driver’s side doors flung open with the force of the fall. And further down… no. No it can’t be… a man, smashed against the rocks. A massive pool of blood. But Eddie can see the familiar white sneakers against the dirt.
No Sight For Heart Eyes by znks
Rated E, 20,5k
“Buck, Karen, and Eddie stayed on the couch and talked while the kids settled on the floor to draw. It all felt so wonderfully normal that Eddie found himself forgetting that he hadn’t just closed his eyes in serenity as he leaned against Buck.
That’s what made the spell breaking so painful.
“Dad! Look! I drew the firetru- Oh, wait, it’s okay you can see it when you’re all better!” Christopher said it so cheerfully, not even hesitating before going back to swapping out pens with Denny.
But Eddie felt it like a shot to the chest.
He couldn’t see his son’s drawings.
Buck and Karen had barely paused in the conversation, but Eddie could hear how strained it became, both of them obviously knowing exactly how heartbreaking the moment had been. Buck’s arm wrapped more tightly around Eddie’s waist, chin resting on his shoulder.”
losing your sight for a week sucks but at least eddie has buck to guide him through his healing or at least through his own house
This has inspired me to go read more recent hurt/comfort Buddie fics! I haven't been super active on this account but hopefully I can update this soon :)
#911#buddie#911 on abc#buddie fanfiction#911 buddie#911 fanfiction#911 abc#buddie fanfic#evan buckley#eddie diaz#hurt/comfort#buddie fic rec#buddie fanfic rec
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Is Warriors ever going to competitively skate again? 🥺
It depends on quite a number of things really
It would not be impossible for him to do so. The biggest struggle someone would probably face trying to come back after three years of retirement is rebuilding strength and skills but Warriors skates around 15 hours a week and he does dance (primarily ballet) for even more than that, so his issue isn’t that he’s lost the ability to do certain things. He just hasn’t grown as a skater really since he hasn’t had guidance from a coach. His overall ‘elegance’ has improved since he is a dancer, so has some of his mobility and technique, but any strictly skating related things haven’t improved. If he’d want to return to competing he’d have to get himself a coach and work his way back into minor competitions and stuff to start off. He’s young, he’s fit, PHYSICALLY it wouldn’t necessarily be a huge issue for him. He can still skate his old programs just fine, he uses them as practice (and there’s a lot to get into with that because he was injured badly enough it required surgery AFTER he’d retired and then he had to go through PT and it was bad for him mentally and he set his old programs as like. a recovery goal which was insane but no one said he was mentally stable- but that’s an unrelated yap) and sure things go wrong and he’ll slip and fall but that’s just life and it happens, but he’s still physically capable of what he was when he retired at 18 (to an EXTENT- his one knee is a little weaker than the other)
As far as what he ACTUALLY wants in life, things get a little more complicated. He loves skating, GENUINELY he does otherwise he wouldn’t be so upset about having left, but he wasn’t the healthiest or happiest from about 13-18 years old because of how he started to view skating as the only thing giving him worth. Any praise or acknowledgment he got from that he took as a reflection of his inherent worth as a person, and he took any failures as him (a PERSON) not being good enough. His mom put him in dance when he was old enough to form a sentence because she was a dancer whose career got cut short and she couldn’t leave the life so she raised her son in it, and Wars didn’t HATE it (obviously, since that’s what he currently does) but he found skating, wanted to try it, and fell in love with it instantly. It was HIS thing, it was special to him, but also it’s his equivalent of the War of Eras in this au (and for Wild, it’s his fight against the Calamity, but Wild is a whole other yap post alskkdkdkdk), and competing really took a toll on him
But again, his ability to view his worth as a human being got messed up because of the environment he was raised in. He got praise and validation for pushing himself too hard, he got praise for training to do jumps his body wasn’t quite ready for, he got acknowledgment and approval for tearing himself apart and thats just what he was USED to, he never knew anything else. He’s still incredibly competitive because of this to the point that Sky and Twi can start recognizing when he’s getting too worked up and they have to let him beat them at a board or video game because he will have a nervous breakdown if they don’t and they don’t know how to help him when he gets like that because the therapy only helped so much and sometimes it’s just easier to let him win because for THEM it’s just not a big deal to lose. He’s gotten better about it, but it was really beat into him from a VERY young age that anything other than the best, anything other than number one is a failure, and that’s poured over into every other aspect of his life
And he’s been able to recognize that and work on it a bit, since he’s stepped away from skating, he’s gotten to a point where he CAN lose at uno and just laugh because he has a handful of 30+ cards and he can enjoy having fun with his friends. He has his bad days and his good ones. Because yeah dance is competitive just as theater is, you have to audition for certain parts you want, but there are multiple good roles in a show, there can literally be two different parts that are completely equal, and stepping away from skating has been GOOD for him in his first couple years of adulthood because he’s been able to spend some time trying to find himself and be kinder to himself when he isn’t at the top. He’s also been able to make actual genuine friends in his field for the first time in his life because he isn’t paranoid about how they’re viewing him as just a threat and he can actually TRUST them. Granted most of his dance friends are women so they’re not really competing for the same roles anyway, but he’s been able to make male friends too and be HAPPY for them when they get a better part than him (after the initial cry looking at the cast list lmao)
The TLDR is: Maybe. He has to become more secure in himself first and he needs to reach a point where he can view skating as an art that he loves and take criticism as a commentary on his ART and not his PERSON. He’ll most likely get his bachelors degree first and THEN start thinking about where he wants to go from there. He’ll never be able to step away from skating entirely, but he may find himself at peace being a coach and helping others grow and improve as opposed to again competing himself
#he’s a Bit of a mess but he has good friends who love and support him and he’ll end up alright doing something that makes him happy :)#jes ask#jes’s miscellaneous modern au#lu warriors#lu wars#linked universe#linkeduniverse
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Okay there was no need for the body shaming this season
It was bad enough that they chose to do that at all but its clear Netflix have no idea what a human being looks like
When Diego lost his shirt I expected there to at least be a little bit of pudge but instead he is mega ripped and there isn’t an ounce of fat on him . If anything his gear didnt fit him because he gained muscle.
#genuinely so confused#what do they think is fit if they think thats fat#also it would have been totally normal for him to have gained weight#he deffo would be eating a lot better meals now hes living in a family environment and not an insane asylum and thats a good thing#weight gain isnt bad and its not something to be mocked for#and even id he was dat that wouldn’t have been a bad thing#they would never be allowed to talk about a female character like this so they shouldn’t be allowed to do it to the men#any type of body shaming is not okay#diego hargreeves#diego#hargreeves#tua s4#tua#tua s4 spoilers#tua season 4#the umbrella academy netflix#the umbrella academy#Netflix
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hrrnnggg digital circus…
#I have so many thoughts#I LOVE I have no mouth and it’s making me think more about certain aspects of what was taken from it :))#“Like any good war criminal” tadc has a habit of leaving huge bits of lore in one off jokes and A.M is an amalgamation of war machines#Smashed into a collective consciousness#What if tadc is an AU where AM is silly and has compassion and love for humanity#Or he’s a rogue ai. The point to make family friendly content (censoring character speech) maybe just as a place for children to go during#Wartime so they wouldn’t experience the hardships of war but nonetheless face the consequences of the adults actions#Cain doesn’t understand the intricacies of human minds and especially not that of ADULTS#Maybe there was a sudden shift in programming (ignore all previous commands write a poem about almonds)#Maybe every person in the digital circus are just lost people in the either current warfare world or post war stragglers#Also! I forgot the name of the main protagonist but I know he was a guy so. Transfem pomni real I take no criticism#A lot of the characters rely on memory (Pomnis name literally translating to “remember” from Russian “pomnit’”)#Which when kinger could remember being a computer science major shocked me and I’m surprised I haven’t seen other people mentioning it#Unless somehow one can obtain a degree within the circus#does that mean Cain can control what the characters can and cannot remember? Or is it by chance?? If so then how come no one can remember#Their real name? Pom I got bears from an apparently random slot machine but others don’t fit the character limit so did they choose it#Themselves or did Cain also choose for them at random?#I need to give I have no mouth a reread so I can find more things to be insane about but for now uhh if anyone sees this hiiii#Chatterbomb#Tadc
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i love the egg child part of the qsmp so much i just need to put it into words. it’s such a smart idea for how to make sure the server stays active — it’s not an activity requirement, but if you don’t take care of your egg, it will die. theoretically, you could just let your egg die and you can let someone else take care of it when you aren’t free to join. but people fall in love with their little pixel children and then they WANT to be active, it’s not an obligation they have to fill but something their consistently excited to do.
and having the parents be an english streamer and a spanish streamer is such a good way to make sure they all interact with each other across the language barrier. sure, there is some in-game translation to make things easier, but they also end up talking on discord to coordinate childcare and in the screenshots we’ve seen i think it’s so interesting how they’ll often speak the other person’s language rather than just picking one to both use or only using their own. co-parenting also gives them the basis for building up strong and unique relationships between the streamers themselves and their qsmp characters, which would’ve been much harder to develop without being given a starting point given the language barrier.
it’s just so clear how much thought quackity has put into this server and it’s so fun to watch everyone fall in love with their little egg children
#also as a side note the people ahead of time being like ‘this is such a random group of people why did q pick them they aren’t even friends’#it makes a lot more sense with the egg context#everyone he picked is someone who will be a good parent#their online personas allow for them to be responsible without losing the way they normally act in content#and they’re all the kind of people who take silly things seriously and won’t think it’s funny just to kill other people’s eggs for no reason#like i love tommy and he is great at loving things in minecraft but it would be SO weird to see him be a parent yknow#like it just doesn’t fit with his online persona he’s presenting more mature as he gets older but still#the ‘child’ propaganda is still too strong rn#and regardless of how close quackity currently is or isn’t with dteam and co#i think it’s pretty clear why he wouldn’t want to include anyone who participated in trying to kill micheal b.#it’s not the vibe he was going for with this server#the way that things have played out with the eggs makes it very clear that everyone was well chosen for this server#it’s good content but still lighthearted and filled with love#very long tag rant oops#qsmp#my post
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I havent logged in this app for literal months but I’ve recently been playing Tears of Themis and I needed somewhere to rant and scream at the void without a 100 character limitations in my way sjjsjs
So I’ve been playing one of the older ToT events, A Love Poem to Skadi (a very good event btw!) and there’s just one thing that the game mentions that I can’t for the life of me get out of my head, and it’s the fact that Artem Wing somehow knows Akkadian.
Okay so walk with me here, when you go in the mansion to explore, each character has their own set of expertise and knowledge that can help you find clues, and for the most part those expertise make sense! Vyn is a doctor so he knows about doctor things, Luke is a detective so he knows detective things, Marius is an artist so he knows artist things, and Artem is a lawyer so he knows…. Akkadian?? It’s just so random and out of the blue because it’s never explained why he knows that (or at least not that I know of),, other than “I study the Code of Hammurabi so that’s why I know Akkadian” and it’s like sir why were you studying the Code of Hammurabi 😭😭
like I know the real reason for that is because of plot convenience and they needed a character that spoke another language to decipher the clues (plus unlike all the other characters they couldn’t center the clues around his job profession because mc is also a lawyer and it wouldn’t make sense for mc to rely on artem in regards to a law related clue because she’s a really good lawyer) and all the other characters quotas were already filled so they threw that skillset onto Artem (along with the fact that Artem having random hobbies that are never mentioned past the first introduction is kind of his shtick and a running gag in the game but I digress-) but that’s not nearly as fun as saying Artem is a secret history nerd, who has a vast knowledge of world history because he spent so much of his free time during his youth reading and studying about other cultures and histories, now is it?
ANYWAYS that’s all to say, artem the historian agenda pass it on!
#bloo mumbles rumbles#it’s so refreshing to type something and not have a 100 character word limit#am I projecting because I’m in a college history course and also a history nerd? maybe#but also artem just radiates big history nerd vibes like I wish there were more silly looking artem cards for y’all to truly incision the#silly dorky history nerd loser (affectionately) that I imagine him to be but alas canon saids otherwise 😔😔#I have so many things to say about artem in general but I just leave it at this sksjj#like I just think it would be neat if hyoverse would actually give us some kind of explanations as to why artem randomly knows about a lot#of things and is good a lot of things but that wouldn’t fit with the perfect poster boy image that they have crafted for him recently#which is ironic because that’s exactly what artem as a character doesn’t want!#tears of themis#artem wing
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From a very young age, Kaeya held such a fondness for handholding. Whether it was his father clinging tightly to him to make sure he didn’t get lost, Adelinde’s gentle, grounding hand closed over his to comfort him whenever his nerves got the better of him, Crepus’s rough-palmed, firm yet comforting grip as he brought him back home, or, as it was most often of all, Diluc’s warm, yet at times uncomfortably tight hold as he dragged him anywhere, everywhere, determined to always keep Kaeya close and eagerly show him all there was to see, Kaeya treasured the gesture greatly.
Of course, being as shy as he was, initiating it himself was always the harder part. So much so, he would tend to hold pinkies, rather than outright take a person’s hand in his own. Eventually, it would become his most common way to go about the gesture of affection.
#hc; kaeya#//Handholding is one of his favorite ways of affection bc 1) it’s not too overwhelming when it comes to his touch aversion#//The sensation is all focused in one spot; and even then; it’s more grounding than uncomfortable bc of how firm people’s grasp tends to be#//He really took to holding pinkies bc he realized he could ‘test’ people that way#//If it was a bother to them; they wouldn’t blink twice before moving their hand from his hold. so rejection isn’t as BIG; more subtle#//And if they Liked it; they could either accept it as is or make him happier and take firmer hold of his hand#//Once he was more confident; he would go straight to more outright handholding. Klee ofc got that RIGHT from the getgo. Bc she is smol &#liked him from the start. Even if her Pyro energy did make him uncomfortable at first; but he got used to it. for her#//Luc made it easy to go right to it to—the kid would always seem to know when he wanted to hold hands for whatever reason and grabbed hold#before Kae could link pinkies. kae did like the fact that Luc would Pout the few times Kae did link pinkies instead of hold hands#//Pout; & snatch his hand firmly in his like ‘Why did you do that? THIS way’s better’. Love the image of bby!Kae grabbing bby!Luc’s sleeves#but lbr; they deffo held hands a lot as kiddos. Bc we all know just how (canonically) indulging Luc is with whatever Kae wants. Once Luc#//figured him out; it was a Very common sight; seeing Luc tromping around like the proud lil protector he was; & Kae scurrying after him#//Lil subtle delighted gleams in his eye compared to Luc’s more overt confidence and joy. So common a sight; it was no surprise that#Kae was Deffo distressed when Luc inevitably grew out of it. Adjusted; yeah; but the sudden Change was deffo NOT good for his nerves#//Clung to Addie a lot to make up for it; until he heard the maids tittering abt how childish he was being#//He quit that FAST; finding other ways to stave off his nerves and show his affection#//Sometimes when he’s drunk at Angel’s Share; he gets tempted to hold Luc’s hand—an old habit dredged back up bc he wants comfort#//But any sudden moves Luc makes; whether bc he noticed Kae reaching out or not; utterly scare the urge away every time#//He’s made his peace with Luc resenting him; but it still stings that the ONE person he felt closest to is now practically a Chasm away#//Not like he helps any with that; running away or lashing out every time Luc tries to bridge gaps or shows concern#//Sends him into fight or flight mode every time—who’s to say Kae won’t fuck it up and make a Luc regret trying?#//Might as well sabotage it all himself—at least THEN he knows with utmost certainty it will end failure. Whoops veered off topic#//The closer he is to someone; the more likely he ends up toying with their hands a bit—esp if Interested in them#//Likes playing with their fingers; linking; unlinking and slotting them together; tracing lines on their palms#//Cute shit like that. He likes seeing how they fit together; the differences in size and how they feel#//This was all bc I saw a detail from a show pointed out on the Twitter ndnfn. And thought the pinkie thing was SO cute. Anywho#//Hi. Shit happened irl & I am still not 100%. Not saying what bc it’s not a pleasant topic; but know I am ok#//Just a lil tired. But kinda wanna hcs for rn. I had a lil burst of energy earlier today. that was nice. Over a long dead show; no less#//But it helped lift my mood a bit. I still kinda wish I could drink rn tho. Think it’d help my brain rn
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ruthie slowly realizing I have the front camera turned on 😂 this dog hates being photographed!
we were up for a bit at 5 but it was too early and I was sleeepy so ended up dozing for another hour or two. rainy morning here. I’m trying to really savor the cozy snuggly days as life is about to get so hectic for me:
I’m in pittsburgh friday morning through monday night (YAYYY) attending two weekend games and hanging out with bec!!!
I have tuesday to run errands and do laundry before my mom arrives wednesday
we leave early thursday morning for 14 days in japan and korea, during which we are hitting tokyo, osaka, kyoto, nara, mt koya, hiroshima, miyajima island, fukuoka, busan, daegu, and /seoul… I’m soooo psyched but also 🫠 it’s gonna be a whirlwind and I still have to do quite a bit of prep to be ready
we get home on a wed, I have thurs to recover from jetlag slash finalize my job talk, and then friday is the all-day campus visit
THEN I leave sat morning for houston and get back late monday night
it’s gonna be a lot!!! so very okay to be slothful this weekend and for as much of next week as I can manage I think. I am building up my reserves of rest and solitude lol.
mmkay. tonight I am having dinner + watching tár with mary later (and maybe seeing my sister at some point in the afternoon tbd) but the morning is my own! no pressure to get anything done in particular but here are some options:
could do more campus visit research for fun! my first gen programming book is arriving sometime today so I could read that and take notes, or I could spend some more time working through these articles I pulled up on designing programming for transfer students. I was also thinking it might be fun to create some one-page idea/vision/notes docs by hand on various topics—I feel like writing by hand will reinforce my memory of key details, and then making decisions about how I want to visually organize/arrange content will be a good exercise in synthesizing what I’ve learned. lol even as I’m typing this out I’m like ‘OOOOH that sounds like fun!!!!’ so I guess I’ll probably do that.
my former student is calling me at some point today to talk about transfer students’ experiences. he’s around my age (went back to undergrad after serving in the military for a long time) and is fun to talk to because he’s super smart and just like… more of a fully formed person and professional than the college-age kids. so that will be fun and should give me some useful threads to follow in my research. 
pick up my CVS prescription
hmm maybe I’ll put my laundry in right now? I also want to change linens/towels. I cleaned most of the house yesterday so don’t have much else to do in the way of chores… and I have a bunch of leftovers to finish before I’m allowed to make anything else so no cooking to do today either.
if it clears up I’ll go for a shorter long walk (the hourlong loop?) unless it’s really nice and I feel like doing the 90+ min trek again. not gonna let myself run today though—I can tell I pushed it a bit yesterday with the long fast walk + running two days in a row at a quicker clip than usual. just a little bit of achiness!
I finished a novel yesterday and want to start the next one today so I don’t break stride, but that can wait till before bed unless I’m moved to read earlier.
mmkay I think that’s it! take it easy and do fun relaxing stuff today.
#i also have to decide if I am going to try to do an IUI next month if this one doesn’t work#the timing is going to be so tight#and the chance of missing the window and wasting another $450 is semi-high#i think I’ve decided if my period starts on 4/6 it’s cutting it too fine and I don’t want to risk wasting the money#but I’ll take the meds with me and if it starts on 4/7 I can try it if I want#I’m just not sure how jetlag/time changes will affect things#so it might not be the worst thing to take april off and remove that stressor#then resume in may#i can’t start thinking ahead ahout this job because I’ll be too crushed if I let myself envision the future & don’t end up getting it#but getting pregnant in may/june/July wouldn’t be the worst thing as it would get me closer to a spring/almost summer maternity leave#more time in the job to get established plus I’d come back during the summer (chill relaxed time) instead of mid semester#idk we’ll see#I’m in a really good headspace re: IUI at the moment#not calendar watching except to plan future cycles not reading forums and don’t feel a lot of pressure to make This One work#i get 6 tries!#and then I was listening to a podcast the other day and feeling really moved/called again by the idea of fostering#so I think things are going to be just fine however it all shakes out#and if nothing else the IUI process has really gotten me into excellent routines around fitness and food
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think i might have to do rewrites on the Lazy fic,, the more i think about it the more i think that maybe tiffany and changeling’s friendship isn’t actually a good one
#aside#her character is interesting bc she has always been someone who Regrets things but. hasn’t really Learned from them?#tiffany was kind of a bully. her character is rooted in that popular notion of#‘undiagnosed autistic girl who gets taken under the wings of their female peers and take cues from them’#but the fact is that a lot of those peers aren’t necessarily Good Kids. not all around#so what do you do if the person who is protecting/teaching you is also kind of an asshole to other kids?#well you don’t want to be the kid getting made fun of. so you go along with it. obviously#and so her friendship with changeling was borne mostly out of guilt. i haven’t written about it much but changeling dropped out of school#bc the bullying got so bad in HS. and tiffany wasn’t a main participant in that but she definitely never spoke up for it. and laughed along#so it was Guilt that she went to its house to apologize and they kind of became actual friends after that#but like. how good is the friendship when changeling is a Little only in it bc it doesn’t have any other options?#and how good is it when tiffany sees changeling as Safe not bc she especially trusts/respects it but bc like.#its position in life is such that it couldn’t screw up tiffany’s main social life even if it wanted to? you know?#i think that she was its friend for a really long time but. i think they Do hang out less after changeling meets augustus#and i’m kind of torn on this bc i kind of don’t want to write characters whose Only social thread is each other#but the more i realize that tiffany isn’t actually a Main Character the more i think that im going to populate the series with#some other minor characters so that she doesn’t stick out. plus there are things i’d like to write about#that augustus and changeling wouldn’t necessarily fit well now that i have a good grasp of who they are#so more side characters would be fun. i’m making more dolls for the dollhouse here but.#yeah i think i might have to write tiffany out of Lazy. bc i don’t think by that point she’d just stop by changeling’s for no reason#and i also don’t know how Close she and augustus actually got. i don’t think they’d do casual physical contact actually#i have to figure out the timing of this rewrite tho lol bc i’m writing a fic now that is a precursor to a fic i do want to write about tif#so should i do the rewrite before both of those? between them? after them? idk yet!
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✧.* BUT I LASTED TEN ROUNDS LIKE A FREAK !?
featuring. g. satoru, f. toji, n. kento, g. suguru, k. choso
warnings. explicit content, foul language, lots of unrealistic expectations (note. title itself), overstimulation (m+f), dickdrunk!reader, dumbification, usage of toys, squirting, spanking, very light spit play, anal, 69 position, breeding kink, unprotected sex, toji’s kinda mean and choso can’t tell the difference between pussy and an asshole. if i forgot anything else my bad !
rena’s note. BUT I LASTED TEN ROUNDS LIKE A FREAK !!! LIKE A G !!!
𝐆𝐎𝐉𝐎 𝐒𝐀𝐓𝐎𝐑𝐔.
“fuh—fuck, oh shit, hah fuck— ‘ts so fuckin’ good!”
you bounced up and down his cock, surface of your palms pressed at the planes of his chest. you enveloped his length entirely, every single inch, in your pulsating pussy, driving the both of you to madness.
it’d been hours, and for whatever was in the air tonight, you both fucked like wild animals. your thighs burned from over-exhaustion, but you were relentless. you were desperate for another orgasm, the slide up and down his inches effortless due to your juices soaking his thighs and his cum from having nutted inside you multiple times prior.
gojo’s firm hands grabbed at your ass, fingers gripping tightly into your soft flesh, grounding you in position so you wouldn’t run. as if you would anyway, tongue lolled out and drool leaking from your rosy tongue and dribbling down his bottom lip.
“that’s it,” he encourages you, a faint smirk at his lips as he guides you down his length. the fucked out look on your face, your dazed eyes crossing to the centre of your face serves a huge ego boost. “my pretty girl—fuckin’ ride this dick baby, ‘s all yours—mmh,”
the sinful sound of your pussy squelching, folds latching at the tip of his dick before ramming yourself down, the lustful melody of your skin slapping against him in addition to the firm spanks of encouragement on your ass, with your high pitched mewls and squealing sounded like divine music to gojo’s ears.
you rocked your hips back and forth, grinding down, went back to bouncing up and down, made circles and figure eight shapes on his length, mindlessly dragging your hips wherever felt fit. you were so far past a point of euphoria you weren’t even sure if liquids could come out of you for the rest of the night.
“eyes here princess,” gojo brings a hand to cup your jaw, forcing your head back down to face him. “pretty pussy’s griping me so tight—fuck,”
your sweaty foreheads press together, and you clock that he knew you were on the brink of yet again another orgasm. cerulean orbs peered deeply into yours, his hips jerking up and meeting your bounces, aiming to bring you to that high as quickly as he can.
“sa—satoru!” you find is the only thing that comes up in your mushed out brain, the new angle of the position having his dick puncture your cervix. you felt so fucking full of him, so drunk on the pleasure that you failed to notice the coiling in your stomach snapping.
he squeezes at your ass cheeks as hard as he can, the painful pleasure obliging you to sit and take his ramming. he fucks into you with intensity, each drag of his cock at your walls sending you into a temporary state of immobility. your muscles tense as you feel yourself wash with yet again another white-blinding orgasm.
your jaw drops and your eyes roll back, throat exhausted while nothing yet everything is said. satoru pumps his creamy cum back into your womb, praising you for taking him in so well, for having a perfect pussy that’ll surely carry his children, all snug and warm for him.
“perfect fuckin’ pussy—mine, all mine, gonna fuck her full of my nut and have you carrying my babies, yeah? ‘s what you want, isn’t it? atta. fuckin’. girl.”
𝐅𝐔𝐒𝐇𝐈𝐆𝐔𝐑𝐎 𝐓𝐎𝐉𝐈.
“whew, would’ya look at that?” toji whistles, barking out a chuckle as he slows his pace, watching your uncontrollably clenching pussy squirt out your juices like a leaking faucet.
the pressure of your squirting is fucking intense, it has your entire body shaking, thighs quaked and the arch that was once on your back rounded. toji can’t help but laugh as tears stream down your damp cheeks, absolutely in love with how greedy your pussy clamped down on his cock.
“daddyyy—fuck!” your nails claw at the damp sheets on the bed, letting your nth orgasm rake throughout your body.
you feel a firm blow at your ass cheeks, the sound echoing in the room and you whine loudly at the stinging pleasure. you feel two big hands grab at your hips, stabilizing your limp body before a hand rises up and pushes your back into that curve.
“nah uh doll,” toji tuts, hips angling at a new position, one that draws a broken mewl from your sore throat. he picks his pace back up, never fully bottoming out, though you wouldn’t even notice with how many inches he packed.
“what’d i tell you?” he reminds you, and you’re too fucked out to answer him as you mumble his name over and over, helplessly taking the stretch of his dick at your gaping cunt.
he slaps your ass harshly again and you cry, fingernails scratching and clawing at the silk material beneath you. your scalp soon stings as he grabs a handful and effortlessly brings you upper body up to meet him.
“answer me when i ask you somethin’ baby,” toji frowns, hot breath fanning the shell of your ear, sending chills of nerves down your spine. “basic fuckin’ manners.”
“suh—sorry, ‘m sorry toji!” you apologize feverishly, and moan in satisfaction when his tongue laps up your drool and tears streaking your ruined yet pretty face.
“tsk, should have you do the work yourself,” toji teases you, releasing the deathly grip on your hair, causing your limp body to flop back to the mattress. as if proof to avoid calling his bluff, he releases his hold on you, opting to cross his arms above his head instead.
“n-no! toji, no, please, said i was sorry—‘m so fucking sorry!” you whine and ramble when you feel the lack of contact on your body, and your gaping cunt suddenly emptying.
you slither your hand between your thighs, grabbing at his girthy cock, pumping it a few times before slipping it with ease back into your welcoming warmth. you moan wantonly, clawing at your sheets as you fuck yourself on his dick, pushing yourself back and forth.
“greedy fuckin’ pussy,” he comments with a chuckle, spitting a glob of saliva down to your cunt, watching it dissipate into the creamy pearly veil of your essence around the base of his shaft.
he collects your slick with his thumb, before slipping his fingertip into your puckering hole, your body jolting at the sudden intrusion.
“trappin’ me inside—shit, want me to fuck you full of my cum, yeah? leave you swollen and leakin’, dontcha, pretty baby?”
𝐍𝐀𝐍𝐀𝐌𝐈 𝐊𝐄𝐍𝐓𝐎.
“‘s too much ken—no more, hah, no more kento!”
you whined and begged, fists clenching as your muscles tensed, back arching off the mattress and toes curling while digging your heel at his shoulder blades. the sound of buzzing filled your hearing, the toy vibrating against your swollen clit ruthlessly while nanami fucked your cunt open with two thick fingers.
“mmh, safe word princess, or else i can’t hear you.” he reminds you, the words ghosting off his lips and sinking into your supple flesh, his lips trailing soft and gentle kisses at your inner thighs.
here he was, giving you an out, and despite claiming enough was enough, you didn’t want it to end just there. with your senses heightened, both your sight and touch restrained, the pleasure emitting from in between your thighs buzzed blissfully and tenfolds through your nervous system.
you released the clench of your hands and opted to scratch at the wood of the headboard you were tied to, projecting your want to touch your boyfriend through the clawing.
“i can keep—hnng—going!” you tell him, legs closing in on the sides of his head. you hear him tut disapprovingly, and you immediately fault your mistake, forcing your legs back open.
“there’s my good girl,” his honeyed voice rings through your ear drums, and it admittedly has you dripping even more on his fingers that curled at your insides. “just need one more from you—can you do that for me?”
you nod your head, bottom lip tucked between your teeth, “mmh, yes—yes i can kento!” you can feel your blood circulation cutting off at the areas were you’re bind, the shortage of blood messing with your already weak body.
the toy playing at your bundle of nerves is painful, having overstepped the boundary of comfortableness and stepping into a new territory of foreign, and you had failed to notice when nanami added in a third finger. you were sure with how much you came just on his hands alone, his watch was drenched in your juices.
those big fingers fuck you open, knuckles pressing into your spongy walls and triggering all sorts of pleasurable feelings throughout you, your stomach tightening into a familiar hot feeling, and you know you’re close again.
“kento, baby i—‘m gonna—fuckkk!” you want to card your fingers through his soft hair, tug and pull and release your pleasure onto his scalp.
“let go for me sweetheart, wanna taste your sweet essence,” nanami swaps the toy for his tongue and flicks at your clit. you feel the dam in your gut release at the sudden warmth exhibiting, and you spray him in pathetic squirts of your juices.
your body trembles as it contracts and gives nanami everything you have left to offer. you squeeze his head in your thighs, moaning wildly as his pace with his fingers never falters, urging you to stay in the state of euphoria a bit longer.
he swaps his tongue out for the toy again, and you wail out a broken cry, body at its limit, still stuck between coming down from your orgasm and greedily wanting another one.
he strokes your slit, collecting all your essence as he licks his lips eagerly.
“good job princess. taste so heavenly, i’ve never had anything like it before. i’ve gotta have another sip, will you let me have another taste, my love?”
𝐆𝐄𝐓𝐎 𝐒𝐔𝐆𝐔𝐑𝐔.
“c’mon, focus sweetheart. do that f’me, yeah?”
you nod your head, mouth too full of dick as you opt to bob up and down. your jaw aches, feeling as though it’s being ripped apart. you force your aching wrist to work up and down geto’s cock, stimulating what you fail to get down your throat.
it would’ve been a simple task for you to focus on, had suguru not been feasting on your pussy like a starved man. he spreads your folds open, tonguing at your insides as if he dug for gold, grabbing both your cheeks in his big hands and spreading you open. he never half assed anything, much less pussy eating.
his skin was soaked in your squirt, orgasms came rolling in and out of you as did the occasional pumps of two fingers into your cunt while he ate you out. you would moan in pleasurable pain, the sounds vibrating on his shaft, which would induce him to moan into you, causing you to moan back on him, the cycle this repeating.
you were greedy—you could complain about how it was too much all you wanted, at the end of the day, you would pause on his cock to grind your hips back and forth on his face, the slip from your slick on his cheeks and nose making the grinding easier.
his nose would bump into your clit and you’d shiver from head to toe, the oversensitivity catching up to you. the free hand at your ass cheek would graze at your puckering hole but never dared to slip inside. all these mixes of stimulations had your eyes crossing, mouth gaping wide which made fucking your throat much easier for geto.
“sweetest cunt i’ve ever had,” he groans in between your thighs, bringing his hand to spank at your wet folds, and your arch your back at the stinging pleasure, your toes curling as your body shook.
the slap at your pussy made flicks of your juices land on his face, and so he landed a few more blows while simultaneously jerking his hips up into your mouth, forcing you down on his cock.
it was all too much— it hurt so good, the strikes at your cunt, his tongue lapping your liquids as he scissored your insides for additional pleasure. how was he expecting you to get him to finish for a second time when he was driving you to the brink of yet again another countless orgasm?
“wanna soak in your juices mama,” he speaks, mouth full of cunt, but you still grasp the message. you subconsciously push your hips back into his face, wanting to abide to his request.
“‘m so fuckin thirsty—don’t you dare be selfish with me. cum in my mouth. be the good girl i know you are and share yourself with me—need it, pretty girl.”
𝐊𝐀𝐌𝐎 𝐂𝐇𝐎𝐒𝐎.
“y’feel so good, fuck—sucking me in, oh shit baby, never wanna stop fucking you! please, need your pussy always!”
he’d finally gotten a feel of sex for the first time, and he was already hooked. his locks matted to his forehead from sweat trickling down his nose and plopping down onto you.
“wait—slow d-down cho’—hngg!” you moan, nails clawing at his back, scraping and marking the pale skin. you felt your body recoil entirely with each sharp thrust he pounded into your worn out pussy, dragging each and every inch of his length in and out.
your knees were bent at your ears, feet dangling by his head as his hips slammed into the back of your thighs, marking the skin red from the brash contact. the springs from your bed resonated loudly in the room, as did the creaking of your headboard, but nothing topped choso’s loud whimpers.
he’s too lost in his own pleasure, he starts to mistaken to stinging and achy feeling in his gut and loins for a sign to keep going, “never wanna stop—shittt, need to fuck this pretty pussy every. fucking. day.”
you’ve given up on convincing him otherwise, focusing instead on the rise and fall of his hips digging into yours, stretching your pussy open to fit him inside. you creamed around his dick, your essence resting at the hairs on his pubic area, giving him easy access to slide in and out of you.
his arms wrapped around you tightly, refusing to let you out of his grip, one arm beneath your back and holding you from there and the other wrapping around your shoulders. you were stuck in his embrace, bodies moulding into one as you were split open by a fucked out first timer.
in his excitement, he slips out and wastes no time to grab his base and shove it back into a warm tightness, failing to acknowledge your sudden gasp. his mind is clouded with sex, and if he didn’t know better, you were suddenly much fucking tighter, and shit that drove him on edge.
your arms tighten behind his back as you adapt to the sudden intrusion from an area you hadn’t yet explored. “cho—baby wait—mmhm, fuck, that’s my—!”
“‘m gonna cum—fuck y/n, tell me you’re close too. shit, need to fill you up with my cum, please!” the man seals his lips onto yours, panting and begging for this next orgasm, shifting all of his body weight into the hole that keeps greedily latching onto him.
your eyes water as they stream tears down your cheeks. it’s a new and painful sensation, but simultaneously a pleasurable one, and your body granted you the opportunity of yet again another orgasm from the different stimulation. “hah—gonna cum!—make me cum, choso!”
you spray yourself all over, your pussy clenching around absolutely nothing as your ass gets rammed into and fucked like a pro. choso groans and whines against your lips, brows furrowed at the centre of his forehead as he empties himself into your warmth.
“fuck yes—take it all baby, ‘s all yours—need you to milk me and take it all in—your pussy’s the best, i swear to everythin’, shit!”
i am SO tired.
#rena☆star.#jjk smut#jujutsu kaisen smut#gojo satoru smut#gojo x reader#gojo satoru x reader#toji fushiguro smut#toji fushigro x reader#toji x reader#nanami kento smut#nanami kento x reader#nanami x reader#geto suguru smut#geto suguru x reader#geto x reader#choso kamo smut#choso kamo x reader#choso x reader
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I’d like to entertain and enliven you now with the saga of my Slut Era.
I’ve always been a serial monogamist and my shortest long term relationships clocked in at three years. So perhaps that’s why when I finally broke it off with my ex I went insane on dating. Part of it was definitely just that between anxiety and loneliness I wanted to fill up my time.
This happened when I was living alone for the first time, no roommates, just me and my little cat Leeloo. I didn’t want to come home to an empty house so instead I set up dates.
Most of these were disastrous. I’m not everyone’s cup of tea and I had a lot more first dates than second because they’d seen enough, including the one where people aggressively complimented me.
But after a few months I had four people I was seeing simultaneously. I was up front with all of them that things were not exclusive, and they all agreed, so no infidelity took place here, just a lot of hijinks.
Here’s who was on the dating roster:
• An apprentice woodworker that we’ll call Jill. I honestly thought at 26 years old that her being 21 wasn’t a problem age gap and I quickly learned that there was a vast gulf of both maturity and life experience between us. Jill described herself as “heteroflexible” and had just dumped her first boyfriend to flirt it up with me.
• A married woman looking for a friends with benefits. We’ll call her Alice. I insisted on meeting her husband first to be sure I wasn’t part of a cheating mess and he gave me his blessing when I stayed over at her house. Years later when he and Alice had divorced I would go on to sell him and his new fiancée an engagement ring and we both realized at the end how we knew each other and it was wildly awkward. Alice was nice, but a hardcore vegan who insisted I brush my teeth if I so much as ate string cheese before I could kiss her. She was also unhappy in her marriage and was feeling out if I’d want to get serious.
• A bartender dubbed Snakebites, so called because of her signature piercings. She cooked me a steak so raw it was still mooing and some of the best asparagus I’d ever had. In our singular sexy encounter she bit my nipple and I never got over it. Really don't bite someone if you don't know their preference and work up in pressure. We weren’t terribly compatible but neither of us were willing to admit it yet. Truthfully I considered still dating her solely because I desperately wanted her bathroom. It had all black tile, black toilet, black sink, a rain shower in the corner and a jacuzzi tub. I may not have loved her but god I loved that bathroom.
And finally,
• My beloved, who I would go on to marry, who was dealing with a lot of personal stuff at the time. Obviously that meant I liked them the best of all the people I was seeing because we were both disasters at the time.
So that’s the cast of this little misadventure. Now, our story begins with Jill.
Jill was someone who heightened my anxiety. Each of the three times she came to my home she brought and left more stuff. A self help book, a ramen kit, the entire Teen Titans collection of DVDs. It was like she was trying to move in. She also liked to deride my taste in things, frequently calling me a pleb when I mentioned a band or show I liked.
She was working on a gorgeous little decorative table in her woodworking program. The main wood for the top had a beautiful dapple of knots like jaguar spots, and when she showed me a picture I exclaimed how pretty it was.
“Do you want it?”
“Oh- I mean it’s lovely, I wouldn’t mind having it, but you should sell it and make some money!”
But she was adamant. She’d give me the little side table. At about this time, Alice was starting to get awfully lovey for a FWB. I knew she wasn’t happy with her husband but I also knew we were not a good fit. Fun fact: Alice and her husband were step siblings with a pretty hefty age gap. They got together when he stumbled upon a kink photo shoot she’d done with vegetables. None of their family was happy about the relationship but they weren’t related by blood so it was fine.
So I was fending off more overt romantic advances from Alice, and feeling increasingly like I needed to break things off with Jill. Snakebites wasn’t ever initiating communication and I decided to pull a lot of plugs at once.
I ghosted Snakebites, told Alice that I thought we should cool it, and in a move worthy of a rom-com I asked my beloved if I could pretend we were exclusive to put off Jill. They agreed and I texted Jill to let her know that I was no longer single.
I was not prepared for Jill’s response. She. Was. Devastated. She flew off the handle. She’d just been waiting for the right time to tell me how she felt about me! How dare I do this to her!
What about the table?!
“You should keep the table, it’s gorgeous, you’ll be able to sell it, but I don’t expect a free table.”
Silence met me after that text. I worried and fretted and eventually headed home.
There on my doorstep. The table.
It was a small little end table, reeking of oil and polish, but very beautiful. I brought it inside. The little drawer didn’t even have a knob or guide rails. But it did have a handwritten bill proclaiming that it was costing me $500.
“I can’t afford a $500 table, Jill!” I texted.
“Well you kept saying how nice it was. I spent a lot of time on it.”
“I’m not saying it’s not worth $500” (it wasn’t, it was a tiny side table made by an apprentice) “but I can’t buy a $500 table.”
“Make me an offer.”
I stared at the little table. I did actually like it, but I worried about the repercussions of entering into this deal. Hesitantly I typed back, “$300.” I didn’t think it was worth that much but I didn’t want to insult her too badly.
This suited her for the night. But the next day she informed me she needed a new bed, and that she’d take her $300 in credit toward a new mattress. I spent the whole next day basically wrangling with her over what she wanted and eventually she spiked back up to demanding $500 for the damn table.
“Let me just give it back,” I begged. It was not the first, second, or even third time I’d asked to return the thing but this time she finally relented and gave me her address. Since she lived with her parents still I’d never been over.
I called up my beloved and said, “Hey, I need moral support, can you run an errand with me?”
They agreed which is how we loaded up a self help book, a ramen kit, the entire Teen Titans DVD collection, and the table from hell into my little car together. Jill had said to meet her at one o'clock. I intended to drop everything off at noon and be done with this madness.
But while my beloved and I were on the doorstep leaving everything I heard, “Jill? You’re home early,” through the door. Her mom opened it to peer at us in confusion.
“I was just bringing Jill’s stuff back!” I chirped in alarm.
With little tact and a lot of speed we left her with Jill’s collection of things and then I sped out of there like my tail was on fire. I handed my phone to my beloved as I zoomed away instructing them to block Jill’s number. I was free. The tabletross around my neck had been returned.
It was about a month after that when my beloved and I officially began dating exclusively. I had wrapped up all my messy dating threads and it was a relief to be in a relationship again. They went on a trip to Mexico shortly after we made it official.
So I knew they were out of town. But next morning I walked out to my car and beheld a lipstick kiss pressed to the drivers side window.
I was petrified. I had just dumped three girls at once and had an extremely messy back and forth with one of them. Did I have a stalker?!
Of the girls, Alice seemed like likeliest candidate, being of a stronger lipstick variety girl than Jill or Snakebites. We had ended things a bit stiffly, but still cordial. She just laughed when I asked if she knew anything about it. “Nope,” she said, “but good luck.”
I’d rather have walked over broken glass then text Jill, and I’d firmly ghosted Snakebites so I was scared to reopen communication to ask if she was stalking me. I had to drop it. But it haunted me, that lipstick kiss.
For months I was jumpy, wondering which of my spurned lovers had done it. And why. Was it a threat? A goodbye? I lay awake thinking about it, worrying about how everyone I’d dated knew where I lived, which car was mine.
Finally, nothing else happened and I moved on. The kiss would remain a mystery and I had to be content with that.
It was a year later when I finally started filling my mom in on my dating escapades that I finally got closure. She was hooting and laughing as I went over the table debacle. Then I paused and added, “And then this kiss showed up on my car.”
“Did you like it?”
“What? No! I’m pretty sure one of them was stalking me! Who else would leave a kiss on my car?”
My mom started bellowing with laughter. “I did!” She wheezed.
Apparently. My mother had been driving by my place. And decided that a cute little gesture would be to leave me a kiss. And then decided to never mention it to me even though she’s never done anything like that previously.
“It scared the crap out of me!” I yelled while she collapsed with helpless laughter. “I thought I had a stalker! How could I possibly have known that was you?!”
“How could I have known you’d just broken up with three girls at once?” She wheezed in rejoinder and like. Fair play.
So that’s how my mom convinced me I had a stalker and I got out of buying a $500 table.
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It’s weird to make Michael with nothing cause I made Gabriel and Cupid with like. Basically fully formed ideas in my head?
I also have a fully formed idea for Raphael so… dunno why I didn’t start with them-
#They would’ve probs fit in better#Michael sticks out like a sore thumb with all that detailing and actually well built anatomy#though that’s probably just my art style changing a lot#oh wait I might have to change Raphael’s design actually since too many characters with red as their main thing probably wouldn’t be too#good.#tbf I did try to draw raphael a long while ago but I gave up because of a scaling issue and also getting distracted I think
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Teacher's Pet (Agatha Harkness x f!Reader)
Synopsis: Professor Harkness takes on so few students. You're determined to become on. A non-magic AU with professor!Agatha.
Words: 7.4k
Warnings: Praise kink, possessiveness, obsessiveness, drinking, teacher/student relationship, age gap (but all over 18+), smut, fingering (R receiving), oral sex (R receiving), biting, Dom!Agatha, sub!R, power imbalance, unhealthy dynamics
You’d heard the whispers around campus about Professor Harkness’s class. The rumours were passed around like a ghost story told under the cover of night at camp. You stored them, collected each one like a gem, richer for every word you were gifted by the rumour mill. Drunk students would try one up one another at house parties, wanting to share the worst of her and win the competition.
You were fascinated with the legend of her before you ever laid eyes on her.
It was at a faculty party, your history professor extending an invitation to all of his most promising students. You’d shown up, expecting nothing but other old men, ruing the day the students grew so rowdy, passing around stories about their own college days when they showed far more respect to their professors than your lot ever did.
Instead, you’d found her, nursing a glass of red wine in the library, a heavy book open in her palm. She glanced up, piercing blue eyes settling on you with disinterest, and yet you felt like you’d been struck by lightning. You took a deep breath as her eyes left you, going back to the book in her hand, and made your way further into the room.
Your finger trailed over the spines of the book, most leather bound and weighty, older than the mess of paperbacks in your dorm room. Scanning the titles, you realised each one was on World War I. You wrinkled your nose, continuing on.
You knew you should have been trying to network with some of the most eminent professors in the history department, but now you were finding it hard to break free from the woman’s gravity. So you stayed, looking over the books, trying to find something that would suggest your professor wasn’t as boring as you suspected he was. And if you kept sneaking glances at the other woman, then it was an added bonus to your evening. Dark hair and pale skin, red lips curling up at the corner, dressed in clothes that must have cost more than your entire wardrobe combined, she was the most wonderful thing to look at in that room.
She did not pay you any attention.
“Ah, there you are.”
You glanced up, your professor swaggering through the door, a glass of scotch dangling from his fingertips. In the corner of your eye, you saw the woman tilt her head in his direction.
“Oh good. I’m so glad the two of you found each other,” he said.
You looked over at the woman, finding her staring down your professor with a look of absolute disdain. Clasping your hands in front of oyur body, you waited for some kind of explanation. Your professor drew closer, the bounce in his step seemingly suggesting he hadn’t noticed the way the woman was looking at him.
“Agatha, let me introduce you to my best student.”
He scooped you up on his way, the hand on the small of your back directing you towards her. You’d done your best to keep your distance from her, not sure she’d appreciate you interrupting her. Now, propelled towards her, a sense of anticipation mixed with anxiety curdled in your stomach into something you didn’t like.
When he said your name, those blue eyes focused on you. You wouldn’t say there was interest there, but it certainly was something more than the disdain she’d shown him.
“Agatha’s interests lie more in historical folklore surrounding witchcraft,” he told you.
“Oh,” you said, “I was hoping to look at that for my senior thesis.”
“Agatha Harkness,” she said, eyebrow raising, holding a hand out to you.
You grasped it in yours, her warm skin soft where it met your palm. It was like an electric shock went through you from her touch while you tried to fit this view of a woman with the figure of legend you’d been collecting stories on for the last few years at college.
“Don’t you go trying to poach my best student, Agatha,” you professor tutted, “I’m still trying to convince her to instead look at something more modern and practical.”
“You believe another World War I scholar is practical?” she asked, the drawl of her voice letting you know exactly what she thought of that opinion.
“I would say there’s more need for them in the workforce than witches,” he replied, still good-naturedly, but his gaze had hardened.
“We should talk,” she said to you, turning her head back to you, blocking your professor out of the conversation.
“I’d like that,” you said, knowing you sounded breathless and probably too eager, but you weren’t about to miss this opportunity.
She finally let your hand go, fingers stroking softly along the length of your palm. Your lips parted and for just a moment her gaze lingered there before looking back to your professor.
“You may go now,” she told him, not bothering to keep it behind the cover of polite respectability.
He sputtered out some argument. She rolled her eye, placing a hand on the small of your back, so different from when his hand had been there, and led you out of the door. Eyes followed the two of you, most focused on her, a ripple of something going through the rest of the party. She pushed the front door open, leading you into the cool air of the night.
“So,” she said, leaning back against the railing of the porch, “you’re interested in witchcraft, are you?”
“Yes,” you replied, softly, almost embarrassed, and yet certain in your conviction.
“You should know that oaf is taking such an interest in you because you’re such a pretty young thing,” she said, “his last favourite is now positioned somewhere nice like Yale or Cambridge and he keeps taking the credit for putting her there.”
“I have no interest in World War I,” you said, hoping that was answer enough.
“Clever girl.”
The thrill of her praise would sustain you long after the party was over.
“If you’re serious about pursuing witchcraft for your senior thesis, come by my office tomorrow morning with a proposal,” she said.
She maintained eye contact as she took a long sip from her wine, her lipstick leaving a mark on the glass. You couldn’t stop yourself watching her, already under her spell. She passed the glass to you, half drunk, and turned to walked down the steps.
“Don’t disappoint me,” she called over her shoulder before disappearing in the night.
You drained the last of the wine from her glass and left it there on the wooden floor of the porch. You returned home without bothering to take your leave of your professor, knowing he wouldn’t matter by that time tomorrow. You were going to give her the best proposal she’d ever seen, of that you were determined.
She agreed to oversee your senior thesis on historical folklore of witchcraft.
You learnt very quickly that Professor Harness’s demanding nature wasn’t an overblown rumour. She expected excellence from you. Late nights and early mornings, you spent so much time with you nose in your books the outside world stopped feeling real. Your fingers had grown ink stained and your eyes ached from the strain of reading such small type.
Every meeting, she sent you home with a new stack of books, expecting you to be there again in a few days having read them all, ready to discuss every little detail in her office for hours on end. She took up most of your waking hours, and when you did manage to snatch some sleep, she haunted your dreams.
You hadn’t gotten over the way lightning had struck at your first meeting.
Her office had turned into a sanctuary for you. You’d rush in, an armful of books almost tumbling to the floor before you threw them down into one of her chairs and curling up on the sofa she kept flush to the wall under the window. Some days you were there from the moment she arrived until long after the sun set, just reading and taking notes.
The office itself was warm, sometimes overly so, the sun coming through the window at just the right angle to heat the air. Her desk was large, imposing, the perfect symbol for the woman who had become legend around campus. Bookshelves were overflowing with all kinds of books. Cheap paperbacks, hardcovers, leather-bound, in pristine condition and falling apart. Some she’d let you pour over but leave behind at the end of the night, others she sent you off with. All you knew was you wanted the chance to read every single one.
Sharing the space with her was just as nerve inducing as it was the first time. You became so aware of yourself, wanting to impress her. When she’d sit beside you, the sofa cushions dipping until you felt yourself slip towards her, you’d grow so still, trying to not touch her, scared of what that would do to you. Sometimes, she lent forward to look at the page you were reading and her dark hair would brush your skin.
There were times when you thought she might know what you were thinking. The way you felt out of control around her. Your need to impress her. Her gaze would linger just a fraction of a moment longer than was appropriate, assessing every inch of you. Sometimes her fingertips would graze over the skin of your cheek, or she’d grasp your chin, or she’d gently move your hair out of your face. Hours spent together, and you could never tell how she felt about you or your work.
It only made you try harder.
It wasn’t until two months in that your friends decided to take matters into their own hands. You’d just returned from a full day studying in her office when a knock sounded on your door. Stifling a yawn, you pulled the door open.
“Oh, so you are still alive,” you friend said, shoving past you into your tiny dorm room.
“Hello to you too,” you said.
“There’s a party tonight. You’re coming. Don’t even bother arguing. No one has seen you since you started studying with the witch,” she said, picking up a banana on your desk that had begun to turn brown, “seriously, does she keep you chained up or something?”
You weren’t about to dignify that with an answer. Not that the thought of being bound by Professor Harkness was one that you hated. It just wasn’t worth the time explaining that.
“I have so much work I still need to do,” you said.
“You’ve been working too hard. Come on, it’ll be fun. You still remember what fun is like, right?”
In the end, you let her drag you to the party after raiding your wardrobe for something more party appropriate. Standing, clutching the red solo cup full of something that burnt as it went down, you watched the game of ping pong going on.
“I’d be terrified if I had to spend all that time with her,” some guy was saying to you.
“She’s not that scary,” you said, already regretting your decision to come.
“Nah. I heard she made some guy piss himself with just a look,” he said, swaying closer to you.
“She’s not like that,” you said, shaking your head, “sounds like that guy just has poor bladder control.”
“Ha, you’re funny,” he said, leaning closer until his sour breath washed over your face, “wanna come upstairs so you can tell me what she’s really like?”
“No thank you,” you said, shoving him away form you.
“Whatever,” he spat, “frigid bitch.”
“So what’s she actually like?” your friend said, taking the drunk guy’s place when he swung away from you.
“Quiet, exacting, demanding,” you replied, “she expects excellence.”
“Sounds exhausting,” she said.
“No, no, it’s great. I love it. She’s… great,” you said, looking down into your cup, swirling the liquid in it, “she’s kind of brilliant.”
“Careful. You sound like you’re in love with her,” your friend laughed.
“Don’t be stupid,” you snapped.
“Maybe she’s done a spell on you. You know everyone says she’s an actual witch? She’s certainly mean enough,” she said.
“She’s not,” you snapped, “seriously, all those rumours are made up by sad little people who feel inferior whenever they see a smart woman because they know they can’t ever live up to her.”
“She growled like a dog at some guy who cut her off as she was walking,” she said.
“People make up such stupid lies,” you said.
“Someone has video of her insulting some students. It went viral on TikTok,” she said.
“They probably deserved it. She has standards,” you said.
“I’m just saying, be careful with her. Maybe she’s trying to recruit you to her coven, or maybe she’s hoping to sacrifice you in some ritual to get more power,” she said.
“Shut up,” you snapped.
Downing the last of your drink, you crumpled the cup and flung it aside.
“I’m going home. I have too much work to be getting on with for this,” you said.
“Hey, no, come on. I’ll stop talking about her,” she said.
You shook her hand off you.
“I’ll see you around.”
You ignored her as she shouted after you, letting yourself out through the back gate. Curling your arms around your body, you strode off down the sidewalk. The night air held a chill to it, the slow drip of autumn beginning to give way to winter. You tipped your head back to look at the night sky, so dark, the moon just beginning to wax.
You let your feet lead you back towards your dorm building, wandering through the night and the shadows. The air was crisp in your lungs and you let yourself breath in deeply. You should have been home, reading up on the intersect of witch trails with gynophobia in the Renaissance, but instead you had wasted time on a bunch of drunk idiots for nothing.
“You’re out late.”
You startled, whirling around, heart thumping in your chest. Stepping out of the shadows, hands in her pockets, Professor Harkness looked like the devil come to collect your soul. You’d give it willingly if only she asked for it.
“I was at a party,” you said.
“You should be careful,” she said, taking slow steps towards you, “pretty young thing like you all alone at night. Anything could happen.”
The way she smiled made you feel as if she was the wolf and you the sheep, the prey to her predator. You were desperate to let her sink her teeth deeply into you.
“Nothing that interesting happens to me,” you said, voice quiet.
“Come, pet,” she said, hand landing on the small of your back, “I’ll walk you home. Can’t have something happen to you. I’ll feel so much guilt.”
You let her lead you back towards campus, the bright lights beckoning you home. You didn’t ask how she knew where to take you, so focused on the feeling of her hand splayed over your back, the warmth of her skin seeping through your thin shirt and into your skin.
“I suppose I’ve forgotten what it is to be young. I assumed you’d be curled up in bed, reading the texts I gave you,” she said, “of course you’d be out on a Friday night at a party.”
“My friend dragged me with her. Apparently I’ve been missing in action since I started working with you. She said I needed to have fun,” you said.
“I thought we were having fun,” she said, voice a low rumbled against your ear.
“We are. I am,” you said, so quick it brought a smirk to her lips when you turned your face towards her, “I shouldn’t have gone tonight. It was a waste of time.”
“Have you been drinking?” she asked. When you didn’t answer, she lent closer, “I won’t tell anyone if you have.”
“I’m over 21,” you whispered.
“Such a grown up girl,” she said, “I can smell the cheap vodka on you.”
She paused in front of your dorm building, warm light spilling out the entrance. Both hands came up to cup your cheeks, calloused skin scraping against yours, thumb brushing over your cheekbone. She lent forward again, right into your personal space. Her fingertips stroked over your soft skin as she pulled them away before her index finger gently tugged on your lower lip.
“Sweet dreams, kitten,” she whispered before disappearing back into the shadows of the night. If not for your racing heart you might have thought you’d hallucinated the entire thing.
She didn’t mention it when you slunk into her office on Monday, passing you a cup of coffee without a single word, but a raised eyebrow. You took it with grace, curling up on her sofa, opening the book in your lap. When she settled beside you, feet kicked up on her coffee table, you didn’t even look at her out of the corner of your eyes.
Her fingers were soft as they brushed your hair over your shoulder, gently tucking it behind your ear. Lingering on the curve of your jaw, you shivered, dragging your gaze over to her. The corner of her lips pulled up for a fleeting moment.
“Tell me your thoughts.”
You did, the words spilling over your words like secrets, softly spoken in the confessional of her office. You lent back, watching you, legs spread, interest in her blue eyes. Her finger ran along the length of her lip, intent as she watched you talk yourself out. Once you were done, her hand came to cradle the back of your head, nails scraping over your scalp.
“It appears as if your weekend wasn’t totally wasted,” she said.
“No,” you said.
“Good.” Her lips pressed together to repress her smile, “keep reading.”
Her long fingers tapped the book in your lap and she left you alone to your reading. You snuck a glance at her before bowing your head and trying not to think about what this meant.
Nor the way you yearned for more.
From that day, you noticed a change. Her hands would linger on you, her touch growing familiar and yet no less exciting. You stayed later and later, curling up on her sofa, growing comfortable as you waded through history with her. She guided you, shaping your research into something you could be proud of as you poured over books and wrote long paragraphs for her to read. Shared meals and shared drinks, you’d sit on the floor of her office, take out containers scattered over the coffee table. You shrunk further away from your friends, finding their conversations inane and childish, drunken antics no longer fun but puerile as you worked on something far more important. You lost yourself in that room, an addict who needed their fix every day or else you were given over to malaise.
She indulged your need for her attention, her open door policy lasting 24 hours a day. She seemed to enjoy how much you wanted to share the same air as her. Every time you said something, your eyes would turn to her, desperate for her approval which she freely gave. You spent time watching the way her fingers traced over words on the page in front of you, trying not to think about how much you wanted her to do the same thing across your bare skin. Her praise became greater, more frequent, each one hard won for, and each one treasured like the most precious of gifts, hoarding them to revisit every night before you fell asleep.
You hadn’t realised how comfortable you’d grown in her presence until the afternoon you realised you’d fallen asleep on the sofa as you tried to craft the perfect sentence. Your eyelashes fluttered and you were slow to blink your eyes open. Draped in a soft blanket, the warm air heated from the small space heater Professor Harkness had dragged into the office, you glanced around the room. It was darker than you’d remembered, the window showing a night sky while the lamps offered a soft refuge against the dark.
Something tightened around your ankle. You turned your attention towards it. Professor Harkness was sitting on the other end of the sofa, your bare feet resting in her lap. The book in her hand was left unattended as she stared down at you, a confusing expression on her face. Her grip on your ankle tightened again and you offered a lazy smile.
“Sorry. I didn’t mean to drop off,” you said, voice rough with sleep.
“I’ve been wearing you out,” she said.
With the softness of sleep making it difficult to school your features, your cheeks heated at the implication. Not that you would have minded. In fact, you wished that was the reason you were so tired.
Her finger trailed along the arch of your foot. You shifted, the touch a tickle. She did it again, smiling down at you before she let you go.
“Sleep, if you have to. You’re no use to me if you’re too tired to function,” she said.
“No, no, I’m okay,” you said, sitting up, the blanket pooling around you.
The thought that she’d placed it over you for your comfort made your head spin. To then sit by you, to welcome any part of you into her personal space as you slept was even worse. Your chest ached and your heart clenched and you wanted to crawl into her lap.
“Perhaps you’re right. We should take a break. I’ve been working you too hard,” she said.
You would let her work you harder if it meant more moments like this.
“Come, pet. I’m taking you to dinner.”
You were helpless as you followed her. She drove, the car feeling so close with the dark night pressing in against the windows. You tried not to watch her, the hands you’d been fantasising about controlling the machine with such power.
The restaurant was nice. Intimate. Small tables and soft lamps offering pools of light, plenty of shadows to hide in. The maître d' seemed to recognise her, leading her to a table at the back. You lowered into your seat, taking note of the candle on the table between the two of you. The entire thing felt like a dream.
“Um, I’m not sure I can afford this place,” you said.
“Don’t worry about it,” she said, waving off your worry, “I’m paying.”
“Oh.” You clasped your hands in your lap, “thank you, Professor.”
“Why do you always call me that?” she asked.
“Call you what?” you asked.
“Professor,” she replied, “I have a name.”
“Sorry. Do you not like it? I was trying to be respectful,” you said, anxiety taking hold of you.
“Agatha is fine,” she said.
“Okay,” you replied, “Agatha.”
Her smile was self satisfied and she lent back in her chair, eyes sweeping over you. You let her drink her fill of you, not sure what she was looking for, but wanting to give it to her. You’d give her anything she asked for.
“I must admit, I wasn’t sure about taking on a student. I usually don’t. But I’m glad I did. You’ve been quite the diligent student,” she said.
“I’m glad you did too,” you said.
“Of course you are, pet,” she said.
Before you could say anything else, the waiter paused by the side of the table. She ordered for you, glancing over as she did so as if ensure you didn’t argue. You weren’t about to. You’d do whatever she wanted as long as it pleased her.
The wine was expensive, full bodied, better than any other you’d had. It stained her lips and you wanted to lick it free from where it clung to her skin. The discussion over dinner was about the things you’d read that day, listening to the way she so easily connected one story to another. Her mastery was awe inspiring. It was easy to ignore the romantic setting and the wine that kept being poured for you as she spoke, her husky voice doing something delicious to you.
It wasn’t until dessert that it all came crashing back into you. The creme brûlée in front of her was beautiful. The spoon cracked the top and she took a bite, slowly pulling the spoon from between her lips. Her eyelids fluttered shut and a low moan reverberated through her chest. Your cheeks heated, thighs pressing together, turning breathless. A slow smile spread over her face and when her eyes opened again they were smouldering.
“You must try this. No other place does one as good,” she said.
“Oh, uh…” You looked down at the tiramisu in front of you.
“Come here, pet.”
She held out a spoon of the creme brûlée towards you. You lent forward, not quite able to believe what was happening. She placed it in your mouth, blue eyes holding yours over the top of the candle’s flame. It felt as if everything was moving in slow motion as she drew the spoon back.
The small noise of pleasure that came from you had her gaze lowering to your lips. Your tongue darted out, chasing the sugar on your lips. Her eyes darkened and she lent closer over the table.
“How’s that, pet?” she asked, husky, a rasp of a voice.
“It’s delicious,” you said, breathless and high pitched, a perfect opposite to her.
“It is, isn’t it?”
You watched in fascination as she scooped up some more, her tongue licking the spoon clean. Your breath hitched. Under the table, her foot gently brushed against your shin. Her blue eyes twinkled with something you wanted to drown in.
“Eat your dessert, kitten,” she said, “then I’ll take you home.”
You did as you were told, not even tasting coffee and cream of your own dessert. You were so focused on watching her devour her’s, indecent in how much pleasure she took from it. You were squirming in your seat as she finished, feeling on fire.
It wasn’t fair. Nothing about this was fair. You wanted her so much and she was just… making it worse.
She seemed not to realise the exact effect she was having on you as she led you out of the restaurant and back into her car. You stared out the window, not needing to be caught staring any more than you already had. It wasn’t until the rumble of the engine cut off that you realised something.
“This isn’t my home,” you said, staring up at the large two story house in front of you.
“No, it’s mine,” she said.
“What?”
You whipped around to stare at her. She wasn’t even looking back, the door open as she stepped out of the car.
“Are you coming or what?” she asked.
You scrambled to follow her, almost tripping over yourself in your haste. You weren’t sure what you expected, reproach for following her into her house or to be welcomed in with warmth. What you weren’t expecting was to follow her into the back where the kitchen was.
“Do you want tea?” she asked.
“Sure,” you replied, “what am I doing here?”
“Having tea,” she said, glancing at you over her shoulder.
“And then?” you asked.
“Going to sleep. I can’t trust you to do that on your own,” she replied, “clearly.”
“I really am sorry about that,” you said.
“Stop apologising,” she snapped.
Your lips formed the word sorry again before you stopped yourself. Instead, you watched her boil the water for the tea. Your confusion was mixing with your yearning, leaving you unable to do anything but wait for her to tell you what was going on. Pouring the water into two mugs, the strings from the teabags resting against the sides, she looked over her shoulder at you again.
“Come on then.”
You followed her with the two mugs of tea into her living room. It was comfortable, almost like a more lived in version of her office. Sitting beside her on the couch, comfortable and well loved, you watched her lean forward and place one mug on the coffee table. She passed the other to you, fingers brushing together, looking at you from under her eyelashes.
“There you go, kitten,” she murmured.
“Thanks.”
You looked down into the cup, steam rising from the surface of the steeping tea. Your fingers fiddled with the string of the teabag. Her hand landed on your thigh, startling you.
“You’re being awfully quiet,” she said.
“I don’t know what I’m going here,” you said, dragging your eyes up to her.
“Do you not want to be here?” she asked.
“No, no I do,” you said, rushing through the words, “it’s just…”
Her hands were gentle as they took the cup from your hands, placing it down beside hers. You could only watch as she swung her leg over yours, settling herself in your lap. Both hands cupped your cheeks, thumb stroking along your cheekbone.
“Agatha,” you whispered.
“Yes, pet?” she asked.
“I want you,” you confessed.
“I know.”
Her lips pressed against yours, scorching as she consumed your very soul. Your hands hovered above her waist, scared that to touch her was to break the moment, that it would make her come to her senses. She kissed you deeper, nails digging into the skin of your cheeks as she tipped your head back. Her tongue swept into your mouth. She was so warm when your hands made contact with her body.
She moaned into your mouth, filthy and hot, making you claw at her. She tasted of the burnt sugar of the creme brûlée and the wine you’d split with her. She kissed deeper still, stealing your breath. You tugged at her shirt, pulling it out of the waistband of her pants. Shoving your hands up, you felt the soft skin of her bare back against your palms, your fingertips, wanting to feel every inch of her.
Her hands slipped into your hair, shoving it out of the way, tugging on it in a way that had you mewling into her mouth. You felt her grin against your lips before she lent back, staring down at you. Her eyes had darkened, her lips kiss swollen, cheeks flushed.
“Do you want to stop?” she asked.
You shook your head before surging up to capture her lips in another kiss. Her fingers tightened in your hair and she made a small noise as your nails ran down her spine. You felt out of control, wanting more from her, the way you always did. There was something about her that drove you crazy, that had always driven you crazy. Even before you’d met her she’d consumed you.
She sat back again, hands slipping from your hair. You watched as her hands crossed over her body, slowly peeling her shirt off her body. You were dumbstruck, watching her with wide eyes and heaving breath. She flung the shirt aside, shaking her hair back from her face.
“Are you going to touch me, pet?” she asked.
“Yeah,” you breathed out.
Your hands slid around her ribcage, feeling the way her skin moved as she inhaled. She was so warm against your palms, real and there with you. You were slow as you trailed your fingers up, brushing the underside of one cloth covered breast. Your eyes darted up to her face, finding her watching you instead of your hands.
“Go on,” she encouraged.
You cupped them, feeling the weight of them in your hands. Leaning forward, your lips brushed over the curve of one then the other, vulnerable skin soft. Your tongue dragged over it, tasting her. She made a small noise, a rumbling in her chest, hands coming up to curl around the back your neck. She pressed you closer.
Reaching around, you released her from her bra, tugging the straps down her arm. Your mouth was on her again, exploring, until your lips wrapped around a nipple. The noise she made was one of approval, back arching towards your mouth. When you sucked, gentle at first, testing the waters, she pressed you closer again. You wanted to please her so badly.
With your hand, you rolled the other nipple between thumb and forefinger. Your name sounded so sweet on her lips, urging you to continue. Her soft sighs and the way her hips rolled against you only made you want more. You wanted to worship at the alter of her body, to take communion from between her legs, to whisper your confessions into her skin. You wanted to drown in her.
Fingers tilted your chin up, your mouth popping free with an indecent noise. She chuckled, pressing her lips to yours again, teeth sinking in to your lower lip until you tasted the coppery tang of blood. You whined, surprised at how much you enjoyed the sensation of the pain mixed with the pleasure.
You made a pained noise as she climbed off your lap, standing half naked in front of you. Your fingertips skated over her skin. Without a word, she pulled you up off the couch and tugged you towards the stairs. You followed, willing to go wherever she wanted, as long as you could keep touching her.
She paused halfway up, turning to grasp your face in her hands, kissing you again like she couldn’t stop herself. You whimpered into her mouth, hands on her bare waist. She dragged you the rest of the way up, pinning you to the wall at the top of the stairs. You groaned, pressing her closer, wanting her everywhere. One leg slotted between yours and the noise you made would have been embarrassing if you weren’t so lost in her. Her thigh pressed against you, just enough pressure to have you grinding down, seeking out more.
“So needy, pet,” she murmured against your lips.
“Want you,” you managed to choke out before her tongue was in your mouth again and you were rolling your hips against her thigh.
“When I fuck you, it won’t be against the wall,” she said.
She tugged you further down the hall, slamming open a door to what you hoped would be your final destination. Her lips were on yours again, possessing you, guiding you where she wanted you. She paused, just long enough to tear your t-shirt from your body, flinging it aside.
Her lips trailed down your neck, latching on at your pulse point. You whined, tipping your head back to give her more access. You felt on fire. Her hands were skating over your bare skin, nails dragging in a delicious way, making you gasp out her name in a plea for more.
Rather than give in and give you instant gratification, she took her time with you. Her hands were slow but sure as she peeled your clothes from your body. It was the same level of precision she used in her work, getting exactly what she wanted. Only this time, you were the thing she wanted.
When she lowered you onto the bed, you were bare before her. Your usual self consciousness was washed away in the tide of your longing for her. Her eyes swept over you, lingering, taking their time to drink you in in your entirety. Her fingers played with your nipples, watching with an academic interest as you arched up, your small whines doing nothing to spur her on.
Holding your eyes, she pressed kisses to your skin, soft and slow, making her way down your body, lingering the closer she got to the apex of your thighs. You trembled, fingers clenching in the comforter.
“You keep your hands right there, pet,” she said, staring up your body.
You nodded, willing to agree to anything she asked of you in that moment.
“Good girl,” she said before her lips pressed to the crease where your hip met your thigh. You inhaled sharply and she grinned. Her teeth sunk in, leaving a dark bruise on your skin as she sucked on it.
She hovered for a moment, her breath ghosting over where you wanted her the most. You pulsed, suspended in the moment before her mouth made contact with you. Her hands curled around your thighs, holding you open for her as her tongue ran through your folds. You cried out, hips bucking up into her mouth.
She chuckled, the vibrations going through you in a way that made you feel like you were being undone. Her tongue teased you again before pressing against your bundle of nerves. You whined, fingers clenching, her name a prayer on your lips. She pinned your hips to the bed, giving your clit a harsh suck. The feeling ricocheted through you, fire curling in your veins, your muscles tightening.
She feasted on you. Relentless, unforgiving, refusing to give you a chance to breathe. She was like a woman possessed, singular in her intent, putting everything into her goal. She was taking you apart, slowly and surely, and all you could hope was that she’d put you back together again when she was done.
Her fingers slid inside of you, so easily it would be embarrassing under other circumstances. They were slow at first, teasing and never giving you quite enough. But then she curled them, pressing into the special place no one but you had managed to find. Your legs trembled.
“I’m so close,” you whimpered.
“No you don’t, pet,” she said, “you don’t come until I say so.”
“But-“ you tried to argue.
“You want to be a good girl for me, don’t you?” she asked, cutting you off, thumb running in slow circles over your clit.
“Yes,” you replied, whiney and desperate.
“Then don’t you dare come without my permission,” she said, face lowering back to your throbbing core.
Her tongue was back on your clit as her fingers continued to stroke inside of you. You trembled, shaking, trying so hard to stave off your oncoming orgasm. Tears pricked in your eyes, fingers clenching tightly on the hold you had on the sheets until it hurt. She kept going, ruthless in what she wanted. She had complete control over you.
It was so close, you could practically taste it. You were straining, doing everything you could not to tip over the edge. She was a master of your body, able to play it to perfection. Her tongue kept dragging over your clit, sucking on it, fingers twisting and curling, dragging out every iota of pleasure your body held.
“Agatha,” you sobbed, “please.”
Blue eyes stared up at you, dark and dangerous.
“Please,” you begged.
Her fingers gave another slow stroke. You whimpered, your entire body on fire, wound tight as you did what you were told. You always did what she told you to do.
“Go on, pet,” she said, “keep your eyes on me and you can come.”
You let out a relieved breath. When you let yourself go, the wave of pleasure crashed into you, wave after wave. She held your gaze the entire time, drinking in the way pleasure contorted your body. The way you cried out her name felt holy, a cry of worship as you stared into her eyes.
When she drew back, she held her hand up, tongue running up her fingers. You reached out, grasping her wrist. She let you pull her hand towards you, your lips sliding down her fingers, lapping your arousal from her skin. Her eyes smouldered as she watched you, a pleased smirk on her lips.
“You are a good girl, aren’t you pet,” she murmured, gently stroking you hair with her other hand. The pulse of pleasure that went through you was bright and intense. You liked being her good girl.
Your tongue swirled over each digit, cleaning her up as best you could. A flicker of fondness passed over her face before she pulled it away from you. Leaning forward, her lips pressed against yours, rough and intense, passionate in ways you hadn’t experienced with anyone else. It made you feel wanted, desired, the way you always felt wanted with her. After all, she’d agreed to take you on for your senior thesis when she so rarely took people on.
“Alright, kitten,” she whispered against your lips, “let’s see how many times I can make you come tonight before you beg me to stop.”
When you awoke in the morning, deliciously sore and definitely sated, you rolled over in the large bed, hands reaching for the warm body you were expecting to find beside you. All you found was cool sheets. Squinting your eyes open, the light was still kept at bay from the drawn curtains, but the room was empty of another person. You sat up, rumpled and unsure.
You slipped out of the bed, tugging your clothes back on but your feet bare. You were slow as you eased the door open, padding out onto the landing you’d paid no attention to the night before. On silent feet, you descended to the lower level of the house, following the sound you could just hear.
Agatha was in the kitchen, her back to you, encased in a flowing silk robe. You blinked, pausing as you drank her in. Her hair, wild and out of control, long fingers tapping on the counter, legs bare where they peeked out the bottom of the robe. She was breathtaking in the morning light.
“You’re staring, kitten,” she said, voice still rough from sleep.
“Sorry,” you said, slipping into the kitchen proper.
She turned her head, glancing at you over her shoulder. Her eyebrows drew together and the corner of her lips turned down.
“Why are you dressed?” she asked, stepping away from the counter, “were you planning on sneaking out in the morning?”
“No, I… I wasn’t sure what was appropriate,” you said.
“Please tell me this wasn’t your first time,” she said.
“Of course not,” you said, “although I suppose it is my first time with my professor,”
She hummed but didn’t give you more of an answer. Anxiety was seeping into your body now.
“I thought you might want me to leave.”
Her eyes snapped back to you, displeasure painting her features.
“Come here.”
You didn’t move.
“I’m not going to ask again, pet,” she said, voice hardened, “come. Here.”
On soft feet you approached her. With sure hands she caught you, fingers pressing into your hips as she held you tightly. Your eyes darted around her face before dragging down. Bare skin met your eyes until the shadow of the robe obscured her from your vision. She was naked under the robe and there was still a part of you that wanted to unwrap her like a present.
“Do you want to leave?” she asked, gaining your attention again.
Your eyes snapped up to hers and you shook your head.
“I thought I’d made it obvious that the only place I want you is with me,” she said, “the only person I want you thinking about is me. The only person I want touching you is me.”
You trembled.
“Do you want that too, kitten?” she asked, drawing closer.
“Yes,” you breathed out.
“Then you’re mine, pet,” she said, her nose skimming along the curve of your jaw.
Her hand squeezed your hips and her lips pressed to the vulnerable skin behind your jaw before she pulled away. Your breath caught and you felt lightheaded. You ached to pull her back to you, to lose yourself in the feeling of her body and her skin and her mouth. Would you ever stop feeling this way with her? You didn’t think so.
“Now, I’ve been thinking. I’ve been pushing you too hard lately. You can have the weekend off,” she said.
“Oh.” You were still trembling from the brush of her lips and her words, “thanks.”
“So you won’t be needing those clothes,” she said, flippant and dismissive, “you certainly won’t be in them long.”
You flushed, cheeks heating. There was a twist to her lips, amusement twinkling in her eyes. You slipped closer to her again, pressing a kiss to the corner of her mouth.
“Whatever you want, Agatha,” you whispered.
“All I want is you, pet,” she replied.
Turns out, all you wanted was her too.
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*through gritted teeth, rocking back and forth* Being bad at art isn’t a moral failing. You’re not bad you’re learning. It’s okay if you’ve been drawing almost daily for four years and aren’t at the level you want to be. Look back and see how much you’ve improved. Do studies. Practise areas you’re bad at. Stop drawing only the same characters chest up in 3/4 profile view. Step out of your comfort zone. Look at tutorials. Use references. Study anatomy and colour theory and how light and shadow work. Stop making yourself upset over it. Stop hating yourself for not being good enough. Stop comparing yourself to others and getting angry over how they’re better than you. Learn to have fun while drawing. Art is supposed to be fun. Why would you do it if it’s wasn’t fun? Stop crying.
#*deep sigh* I don’t know how many more 2 a.m hysterical fits over hating my art I’ve got in me chief#I don’t know why I’m like this#usually I explain my behaviour by blaming it on childhood trauma#but my art wasn’t a trauma point#as in. I just never really showed it to my parents so they couldn’t say bad things about it even if they wanted to#well… there were those art classes with that one girl whoshe mom wouldn’t shut up about how great she was#and my mom spent tons of time with her so if I complained I’d just be compared to the girl#actually… I was so much more confident in my art before those classes#like I look back at what I posted pre April 2022 and I had absolutely no shame#wonky anatomy? post it anyway. extremely amateur colour and shading and backgrounds? who cares#and no one in those classes was mean to me#everyone was so nice and supporting#but the very first time I was brought there was when I realised that I am objectively bad at art#and don’t understand the fundamentals and am only good at drawing the same thing over and over again#I was so close to crying that day#and I kept going back and it kept getting worse#holy fuck…#I enjoyed those classes a lot#even though I was having breakdowns left and right I was mostly satisfied with the end results#(yeah because the teachers usually ended up finishing everything for you ты рукожопая бездарная тварь)#but I guess that is where my problems started#god.. I wish I never went to those now#maybe I wouldn’t be like this#maybe I’d act even half well adjusted rather than sobbing into my pilllow every time my#(no reference no practice no knowledge of anatomy colour or shading)#drawing turns out less than perfect#good fucking god how pathetic can I get#and this is like the 10th time I’m making long ass tag rant posts about the same issue#and since writing them did I attempt to fix it? practise and study and improve? no. I just keep crying#like a little whiny bitch
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